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♪♪

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[ Birds chirping ]

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-This was 11 years ago, 
I made this.

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-Yeah, I remember that.

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A beautiful beginning the way 
you started off like that.

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-Yeah, the colors 
of the flowers, my mama.

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-Tell me about 
this trailer, Mom.

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When did you get it?

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-We got the trailer in 1994.

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-Oh, '94. 
-Yeah.

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It's legally ours.

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The metal's deteriorating.

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You know, then the siding, 
the roof needs a whole new roof.

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♪♪

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I grew up in Brooklyn.

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-Mean the Bronx.

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But we came down here 
because your niece got shot.

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-No, we got -- 
Makia got shot way before that.

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We just wanted to visit and 
we liked it and we were safe.

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A nice place to raise kids.

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-I like it because, for you, 
it was pretty safe for you.

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-We have gone through a lot 
of health crisis

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with him and stuff like that,

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but we have accomplished 
a mobile home.

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Three brand-new cars paid off.

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One, your dad crashed 
'cause he had low sugar.

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How many people could say 
that they have

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done that in their time?

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Not many. 
-What? Crash a car?

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-No, not crash a car.

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[ Laughter ]

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That's true, right? 
It went right into that.

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That's a good one, honey. 
No, I didn't mean that.

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The robe looks kind of funny, 
David.

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I got a brand-new one in blue. 
Let me get it.

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-You look good the way you are. 
-No, this one looks ugly.

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Look at all the bumps 
and it shows.

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People gonna say 
I look horrible.

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Wait. Okay?

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-Does that look better now? 
The robe?

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-Yes.

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It was in 1981, almost '82.

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'81, we worked together.

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It was called the Federation 
of the Handicap.

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And then we got married in 1994.

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While we were getting married, 
we had to rush him

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to the emergency room 
the same night.

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-Boy, we hated that thing.

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The first visit 
at the kidney center.

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I thank God that I have a wife.

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She take good care of me.

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[ Monitor beeping ]

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Ow.

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Yeah, that hurts right there.

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I need a lollipop.

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-You need a lollipop?

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-My hands hurt me.

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-What's wrong with your hands?

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-Nerve damage.

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Feels like needles sticking 
in my hands,

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a lot of needles.

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Then my hands begin 
to feel like it's on fire.

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♪♪

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-My knee replacement, 
October 2nd,

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I had a knee replacement

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and then I had 
a hip replacement.

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I got two of them.

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Yeah, it's painful,

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but I mentally have 
to get myself better

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because I have other people 
that depend on me,

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like my husband 
and my mom, my dad.

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I remember in 2004,

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when my husband was really, 
really ill,

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I seen my husband 
cringing like this,

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like this, like this 
with his hand -- palm.

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But he was, like, in a state 
like this, really quiet.

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And I seen he was really stiff, 
and I tried to call out to him

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and I see him 
sweating profusely.

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I tried to pick him up,

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but I couldn't pick him up 
and he fell.

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♪♪

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-My experience of death

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was that I felt myself 
floating in a fetal position.

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That's how I felt, 
just floating.

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It felt so good.

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And then all of a sudden, 
I felt like being pulled.

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Have you ever felt -- 
Have you ever done this --

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stood beside your bed 
and just went back.

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You ever done that? 
-Yeah.

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-That's the same way I felt 
going back into my body.

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That's when Mommy -- 
Thank God Mommy was there.

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If not, I would've died.

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After that, 
I just wanted to live.

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[ Soft piano music playing ]

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♪♪

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[ Groans in pain ]

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-Ooh, you sweating, honey. 
Let me get you a blanket.

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Let me get you a towel. 
Let me get him a towel.

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You know, last few years 
weren't easy for him

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nor I as a wife, 
because the way I loved him,

101
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I couldn't, you know, 
help ease the pain.

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-[ Groans in pain ]

103
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I don't feel good.

104
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-You gotta keep eating. 
Eat some of this.

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-Give me more.

106
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-Pop it in his mouth, baby.

107
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Don't let him 
just pop it in there.

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-What?

109
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-Shove it in his mouth 'cause 
he needs a lot of sugar.

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It's at 75. 
Open the mouth.

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-Open your mouth.

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-I know one day, 
I'm gonna pass away,

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but I wanna do it here.

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Do not wanna do it in dialysis.

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-Just a sick guy, 
but he pushed through.

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That's why he was a warrior.

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I say that the word "fighter,"

118
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his name should 
go right underneath

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because he fought until the end,

120
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but his body 
just couldn't take it no more.

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And I had to call hospice.

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-And when he passed away, 
I felt this feeling

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of, like, sadness, 
a little bit of happiness.

124
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That's maybe not the best word 
to use

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but happiness that he didn't 
have to endure a life

126
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that was just gonna 
get worse and worse.

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There's nothing that you or I

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or even the doctors 
could do to make --

129
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-I know, but it's just, 
the memories are so intense.

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I yearn for his voice.

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And even though he didn't have 
a lot of quality of life,

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just knowing he was in the house 
was enough for me.

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And I don't have that.

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38 years of good memories, 
sad memories,

135
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and, you know, rough memories.

136
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But...we did the best 
with what we had and, you know,

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he died with you 
holding his head and me

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like I promised it,

139
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so I know I did the best 
I could as a wife.

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-Yeah. 
-That's the sad part

141
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about this pandemic

142
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that all these people --

143
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fathers, grandfathers, 
mothers --

144
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they die with the nurses, 
but they're not family.

145
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And I'm so grateful and blessed 
that I had that.

146
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So on May 24th, even though 
it devastated my life,

147
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I still find comfort 
that at least

148
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I said my goodbyes,

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and he was here with me 
till the end.

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♪♪

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♪♪

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♪♪

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-I'm one of the luckiest guys 
to have a woman --

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-Listen. Shh.

155
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-Okay, I am.

156
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Don't be jealous, guys.

157
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To have a beautiful woman 
at heart.

158
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She's always been there 
by my side.

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She been a pain in the ass 
sometimes, but she's my heart.

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And she is my rock 
and I love you forever.

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♪♪

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♪♪

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♪♪

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[ Birds chirping ]

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[ Clock ticking ]

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♪♪

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♪♪

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♪♪

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♪♪