1
00:00:00,733 --> 00:00:03,866
(fire truck sirens)

2
00:00:03,866 --> 00:00:06,700
(dramatic music)

3
00:00:06,700 --> 00:00:09,500
- A lot of product gets sold

4
00:00:09,500 --> 00:00:11,400
in and around these 
neighborhood streets

5
00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:12,566
that we work in.

6
00:00:12,566 --> 00:00:13,700
We're right in the middle

7
00:00:13,700 --> 00:00:15,500
of one of the biggest 
selling areas.

8
00:00:17,066 --> 00:00:18,933
- I woke up just so confused.

9
00:00:18,933 --> 00:00:20,666
Like I didn't know where I was.

10
00:00:20,666 --> 00:00:22,433
I still had the 
needle in my arm.

11
00:00:22,433 --> 00:00:23,500
I was kinda upset

12
00:00:23,500 --> 00:00:26,100
because I wasn't high anymore.

13
00:00:26,100 --> 00:00:28,200
- Some of the most troubling OD

14
00:00:28,200 --> 00:00:31,100
calls we go on is 
when we pull up

15
00:00:31,100 --> 00:00:33,300
and we find a young 
mother with her

16
00:00:33,300 --> 00:00:35,733
18-month-old baby 
in the backseat

17
00:00:35,733 --> 00:00:38,200
and a needle in her arm.

18
00:00:38,200 --> 00:00:40,333
- The next thing I 
remember is I woke up,

19
00:00:40,333 --> 00:00:42,400
the drugs had actually 
overpowered the Narcan.

20
00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:45,900
I had to be Narcan'd 
again in the ambulance

21
00:00:45,900 --> 00:00:48,233
and then a third 
time at the hospital.

22
00:00:49,866 --> 00:00:51,633
- Everyone of them 
is somebodies son,

23
00:00:51,633 --> 00:00:52,666
or somebodies daughter,

24
00:00:52,666 --> 00:00:53,700
or somebodies mother,

25
00:00:53,700 --> 00:00:54,733
or somebodies brother,

26
00:00:54,733 --> 00:00:56,200
or somebodies wife,

27
00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:58,733
and I remember all of them.

28
00:00:58,733 --> 00:00:59,933
- Out of all the 
calls I've been on

29
00:00:59,933 --> 00:01:01,866
I think the hardest 
ones are when

30
00:01:01,866 --> 00:01:03,066
I actually have 
to tell the family

31
00:01:03,066 --> 00:01:04,433
that their loved one's dead.

32
00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:09,000
- They went were 
they're serving needles

33
00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,000
and they're risking 
their safety to go

34
00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:12,833
into a place to save 
my life when I could

35
00:01:12,833 --> 00:01:14,933
have been just another statistic

36
00:01:14,933 --> 00:01:18,000
a drug addict on the 
street that died.

37
00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:20,500
(dramatic music)

38
00:01:20,500 --> 00:01:22,100
(muffled talking)

39
00:01:22,100 --> 00:01:24,833
(dramatic music)

40
00:01:27,833 --> 00:01:31,300
(indistinct conversation)

41
00:01:36,200 --> 00:01:39,833
(firetruck exhaust sounds)

42
00:01:43,533 --> 00:01:45,000
- I became a firefighter

43
00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:47,166
because I like to help people.

44
00:01:47,166 --> 00:01:49,500
I'm sure that's a 
very common answer,

45
00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:51,033
when you ask people,

46
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but ever since I was 
young I've always

47
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really liked to help people.

48
00:01:55,233 --> 00:01:56,766
When I was a kid,

49
00:01:56,766 --> 00:01:59,100
a big red fire truck was 
always one of my favorites

50
00:01:59,100 --> 00:02:02,533
so, when I found out you could

51
00:02:02,533 --> 00:02:04,400
actually get paid to do this,

52
00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:05,533
to be a fireman,

53
00:02:05,533 --> 00:02:06,933
and as soon as I found out that,

54
00:02:06,933 --> 00:02:08,900
I was like, "now 
that's the job for me".

55
00:02:09,866 --> 00:02:13,266
- This work is very demanding.

56
00:02:13,266 --> 00:02:15,266
It's very rewarding.

57
00:02:15,266 --> 00:02:17,633
Two days are never the same.

58
00:02:17,633 --> 00:02:21,800
So it challenges you 
on a lot of fronts.

59
00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:23,166
To stay mentally sharp,

60
00:02:23,166 --> 00:02:26,200
To stay really 
physically prepared

61
00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:27,133
for a lot of things,

62
00:02:27,133 --> 00:02:28,533
a lot of the ups and the downs

63
00:02:28,533 --> 00:02:32,733
and the stress, and 
the stress mentally

64
00:02:32,733 --> 00:02:36,533
and physically so it's 
a lot of preparation.

65
00:02:36,533 --> 00:02:39,700
You see the house 
fire fully evolved

66
00:02:39,700 --> 00:02:41,633
and we go in, and 
then we come out.

67
00:02:41,633 --> 00:02:44,100
But there's a lot of prep work

68
00:02:44,100 --> 00:02:48,033
so it's a very rewarding job.

69
00:02:48,033 --> 00:02:51,233
(firetruck sirens)

70
00:02:51,233 --> 00:02:52,633
- When I became a firefighter

71
00:02:52,633 --> 00:02:55,166
I thought that the 
majority of our work

72
00:02:55,166 --> 00:02:56,700
would be fighting fires.

73
00:02:56,700 --> 00:02:57,900
That's changed now,

74
00:02:57,900 --> 00:03:00,400
we serve all different 
types of calls,

75
00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:04,033
all different types of people, 
all different responses.

76
00:03:04,033 --> 00:03:06,633
I never thought that 
the majority of our

77
00:03:06,633 --> 00:03:10,133
calls would be overdoses 
and drug related calls.

78
00:03:10,133 --> 00:03:13,600
And I never expected 
that to be the case.

79
00:03:13,600 --> 00:03:15,133
- I don't think I've 
ever actually sat down

80
00:03:15,133 --> 00:03:17,666
and counted "yup that's one 
for the day, that's two".

81
00:03:19,266 --> 00:03:22,900
So no, on a very busy 
night where we're running

82
00:03:24,166 --> 00:03:26,400
25, plus, calls.

83
00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:31,366
We can go easily on 10, 
10, 11, 12 overdose calls.

84
00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:36,900
(engine roaring)

85
00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:41,300
- [kid] Bye!

86
00:03:41,300 --> 00:03:43,366
- [paramedic] Bye!

87
00:03:43,366 --> 00:03:46,066
(engine roaring)

88
00:03:47,933 --> 00:03:49,133
- [Paramedic 1] They 
made a drug bust

89
00:03:49,133 --> 00:03:50,233
in this house over here.

90
00:03:50,233 --> 00:03:53,100
$450,000 in cash.

91
00:03:53,100 --> 00:03:54,300
- [Paramedic 2] Six.

92
00:03:54,300 --> 00:03:55,133
- 650?

93
00:03:55,133 --> 00:03:56,100
- Yeah.

94
00:03:56,100 --> 00:03:56,800
- This white house right here?

95
00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:57,633
- Yeah.

96
00:03:57,633 --> 00:03:58,533
- We had the shoot out.

97
00:03:59,766 --> 00:04:01,033
- At this fire 
station we're in a

98
00:04:01,033 --> 00:04:02,600
unique situation.

99
00:04:02,600 --> 00:04:06,800
This seems to be the epicenter 
of the heroine epidemic.

100
00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:10,033
If you want to buy heroine 
this is where you come to.

101
00:04:10,033 --> 00:04:12,733
Yesterday the guys came in said,

102
00:04:12,733 --> 00:04:14,766
"There's somebody OD'ing 
on our front bench."

103
00:04:14,766 --> 00:04:16,200
I go, "Really?"

104
00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:18,133
Walked out and there's somebody 
OD'ing on our front bench.

105
00:04:18,133 --> 00:04:19,900
So it's not uncommon 
for me to walk

106
00:04:19,900 --> 00:04:22,833
out pick up a needle, 
sit at the picnic table

107
00:04:22,833 --> 00:04:25,500
and pick a needle up 
out of the flower bed.

108
00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:28,033
There are many, many areas,

109
00:04:28,033 --> 00:04:31,600
I can draw a circle around 
this fire station and

110
00:04:31,600 --> 00:04:34,566
we could go out and 
pick up needles all day.

111
00:04:34,566 --> 00:04:39,533
So, it's a free open air drug 
market, it operates 24/7.

112
00:04:41,900 --> 00:04:43,266
- [fireman] Fire department.

113
00:04:45,800 --> 00:04:47,433
You guys okay?

114
00:04:47,433 --> 00:04:48,266
- [unknown] Yeah.

115
00:04:48,266 --> 00:04:49,100
- [fireman] All right.

116
00:04:49,100 --> 00:04:49,900
Just checking.

117
00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:53,866
- [fireman] Yeah I know you 
had to walk down, you know, so.

118
00:04:55,366 --> 00:04:57,300
- (woman laughs) No we've 
been here since (mumbles)

119
00:04:57,300 --> 00:05:00,366
- No, no, dude, we just 
came to check on you guys.

120
00:05:00,366 --> 00:05:01,700
- [unknown male] 
I was petrified,

121
00:05:01,700 --> 00:05:02,700
I thought it was the police.

122
00:05:02,700 --> 00:05:03,700
- [fireman] No, nope.

123
00:05:03,700 --> 00:05:04,933
Hey we're here, like I said,

124
00:05:04,933 --> 00:05:07,900
we just came to see if 
you guys need anything?

125
00:05:07,900 --> 00:05:09,800
If you were okay?

126
00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:11,400
- [unknown male] No, you 
just woke me up brother!

127
00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:13,500
- [fireman] Sorry, I didn't 
mean to ruin it for you!

128
00:05:13,500 --> 00:05:18,466
But if you need anything, 
don't hesitate to call.

129
00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:21,000
Stop over to fire 
house on Clinton Avenue

130
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:22,266
if you ever need anything.

131
00:05:23,433 --> 00:05:24,700
- I grew up in 
this neighborhood.

132
00:05:24,700 --> 00:05:26,866
My parents still live 
in this neighborhood,

133
00:05:26,866 --> 00:05:28,666
my brother lives in 
this neighborhood.

134
00:05:28,666 --> 00:05:30,633
I still live in 
this neighborhood.

135
00:05:30,633 --> 00:05:31,800
When I was a young kid,

136
00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:35,166
it was a lot different 
than it is now.

137
00:05:35,166 --> 00:05:36,100
Families, everybody 
lived together,

138
00:05:36,100 --> 00:05:38,866
everybody was happy, you know.

139
00:05:38,866 --> 00:05:41,433
Everybody trusted each other 
and took care of each other.

140
00:05:41,433 --> 00:05:42,866
It's a lot different 
now, you know,

141
00:05:42,866 --> 00:05:45,433
kids can't play on the 
street, there's needles.

142
00:05:45,433 --> 00:05:48,866
You know vacant houses with 
needles, all over the place.

143
00:05:48,866 --> 00:05:53,166
There's violence, you 
know, there's homelessness,

144
00:05:53,166 --> 00:05:56,033
there's drug dealers 
on the corner

145
00:05:56,033 --> 00:05:59,200
and people fighting 
and problems like that.

146
00:05:59,200 --> 00:06:01,166
It's not as safe 
as it use to be.

147
00:06:02,366 --> 00:06:04,900
The neighborhoods 
kind of held hostage

148
00:06:04,900 --> 00:06:08,333
you know by this war 
with the drugs and

149
00:06:08,333 --> 00:06:10,800
the money that it produces and

150
00:06:10,800 --> 00:06:13,733
the problems are all 
associated with it.

151
00:06:13,733 --> 00:06:15,800
And it's not a good 
thing, you know,

152
00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:17,900
all the goodness that 
comes out of this

153
00:06:17,900 --> 00:06:20,133
neighborhood is 
all overshadowed by

154
00:06:20,133 --> 00:06:24,500
the drugs and the violence 
that accompanies it.

155
00:06:24,500 --> 00:06:28,200
(car seatbelt dinging sound)

156
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:33,333
- Amos fourteen Andrew ALS.

157
00:06:33,333 --> 00:06:36,066
(dispatcher speaking 
indistinctly)

158
00:06:36,066 --> 00:06:38,933
(ambulance sirens)

159
00:06:40,533 --> 00:06:42,333
- [dispatcher] 3391...

160
00:06:43,266 --> 00:06:46,133
(ambulance sirens)

161
00:06:47,500 --> 00:06:50,233
- Working a rural community 
is really difficult.

162
00:06:50,233 --> 00:06:52,066
You know everybody 
for the most part.

163
00:06:52,066 --> 00:06:53,733
Especially in this town, 
you're very close knit.

164
00:06:53,733 --> 00:06:56,500
You know your neighbor, 
your neighbor knows you.

165
00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:59,600
Very small town less 
than maybe two thousand.

166
00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:02,966
We cover about a hundred 
square mile secular area.

167
00:07:02,966 --> 00:07:04,800
(ambulance sirens)

168
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:06,866
Compass is a couple 
different towns,

169
00:07:06,866 --> 00:07:08,866
the farm land, it 
could be the woods.

170
00:07:08,866 --> 00:07:11,466
I grew up here, and I 
want to help my community,

171
00:07:11,466 --> 00:07:14,000
I've always wanted to be 
somebody that people are calling

172
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:15,933
because they need help.

173
00:07:15,933 --> 00:07:17,466
They don't call me because 
they're having a good day.

174
00:07:17,466 --> 00:07:19,666
They don't call us because 
they're having a good day.

175
00:07:19,666 --> 00:07:21,966
They have probably had the 
worst day of their life

176
00:07:21,966 --> 00:07:23,500
and probably want somebody 
to come and help them.

177
00:07:23,500 --> 00:07:25,600
And I want to be that person 
that they have helping them.

178
00:07:27,666 --> 00:07:30,300
(doors opening)

179
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:34,933
(doors closing)

180
00:07:34,933 --> 00:07:35,733
- [paramedic] Good?

181
00:07:36,866 --> 00:07:39,733
(ambulance sirens)

182
00:07:44,266 --> 00:07:47,900
- [dispatcher] (indistinct)

183
00:07:49,100 --> 00:07:51,566
(door closes)

184
00:07:53,933 --> 00:07:56,033
(dog barks)

185
00:07:56,033 --> 00:07:57,233
- [unknown] Got 
one down on book.

186
00:08:00,166 --> 00:08:01,400
- [fireman] How long 
she been down buddy?

187
00:08:01,400 --> 00:08:03,166
- [unknown male] I don't 
know, I just came up,

188
00:08:03,166 --> 00:08:05,833
she came upstairs not 
even twenty minutes ago.

189
00:08:07,100 --> 00:08:08,300
Twenty minutes ago?

190
00:08:08,300 --> 00:08:10,333
She's been like this 
for over twenty minutes?

191
00:08:10,333 --> 00:08:11,533
- [unknown male] 
I wouldn't know.

192
00:08:11,533 --> 00:08:12,700
She said she was 
coming to lay down.

193
00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:17,133
- [fireman] Any other 
medical history?

194
00:08:17,133 --> 00:08:18,600
- [unknown male] Um...

195
00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:20,066
- So often in healthcare we use 
the term compassion fatigue.

196
00:08:20,066 --> 00:08:22,166
And especially in 
society, as well,

197
00:08:22,166 --> 00:08:25,200
when something becomes our norm

198
00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:27,733
no matter how upsetting it is,

199
00:08:27,733 --> 00:08:31,833
no matter that, you know, we 
have children that are dying.

200
00:08:31,833 --> 00:08:34,500
When it's regular and constant,

201
00:08:34,500 --> 00:08:38,500
it gets too tiring 
to continuously care.

202
00:08:38,500 --> 00:08:41,533
And so we get tired 
and it becomes noise.

203
00:08:42,766 --> 00:08:47,066
(people talking indistinctly)

204
00:08:47,066 --> 00:08:49,766
- [parademic] We're going to 
have to go to the hospital.

205
00:08:49,766 --> 00:08:50,900
- [unknown] Why?

206
00:08:50,900 --> 00:08:52,200
- [parademic] Because 
you overdosed.

207
00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:55,866
How many bags did you take?

208
00:08:55,866 --> 00:08:57,233
Just so we--you're 
not in trouble.

209
00:08:57,233 --> 00:08:58,833
We just want to help you.

210
00:08:58,833 --> 00:09:00,400
- [unknown] I'm not 
in trouble am I?

211
00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:04,533
- If the people who see it 
daily who can not ignore it.

212
00:09:05,966 --> 00:09:10,933
Whether that is police, 
or fire, or EMS.

213
00:09:12,933 --> 00:09:14,866
We can't ignore that.

214
00:09:14,866 --> 00:09:16,900
It can't become our 
background noise.

215
00:09:18,500 --> 00:09:21,233
'Cause we're nowhere 
near a solution on this.

216
00:09:22,800 --> 00:09:27,500
We've had more death 
from this disease

217
00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:31,300
than all the people 
who died of AIDS

218
00:09:31,300 --> 00:09:33,800
during the 1980s and 1990s.

219
00:09:33,800 --> 00:09:38,600
We have far surpassed that, 
and that was an epidemic

220
00:09:38,600 --> 00:09:40,500
that we thought we 
would learn from.

221
00:09:40,500 --> 00:09:42,833
(door closes)

222
00:09:42,833 --> 00:09:45,866
(engine idling)

223
00:09:45,866 --> 00:09:50,833
- [dispatch] She overdosed 
193 (indistinct over radio)

224
00:09:51,733 --> 00:09:52,366
- [unknown male] Come upstairs.

225
00:09:54,533 --> 00:09:57,266
(muffled voices)

226
00:09:58,533 --> 00:10:01,566
(static noise)

227
00:10:01,566 --> 00:10:03,666
(indistinct conversation)

228
00:10:03,666 --> 00:10:06,700
(dispatcher muffled)

229
00:10:07,866 --> 00:10:09,066
- [Paramedic 1] He's 
still breathing.

230
00:10:09,066 --> 00:10:10,466
Let's get him right 
out in the hall.

231
00:10:10,466 --> 00:10:11,766
- [Paramedic 2] 
Hang on one second.

232
00:10:11,766 --> 00:10:12,600
- [Paramedic 1] Oh 
he's freaking cold.

233
00:10:12,600 --> 00:10:13,400
Oh he's moving.

234
00:10:14,266 --> 00:10:17,166
(fumbling noises)

235
00:10:17,166 --> 00:10:18,433
- [Paramedic 2] 
What did he take?

236
00:10:18,433 --> 00:10:19,266
- [unknown woman] I don't know.

237
00:10:19,266 --> 00:10:20,500
- Hey buddy?

238
00:10:20,500 --> 00:10:21,300
- Do you have the 
bottle or something?

239
00:10:21,300 --> 00:10:22,533
- What's your name?

240
00:10:22,533 --> 00:10:23,333
- [unknown woman] I 
think these pills.

241
00:10:23,333 --> 00:10:24,600
- What's his name again?

242
00:10:24,600 --> 00:10:25,700
- [unknown woman] These 
pills, I don't know, I--

243
00:10:25,700 --> 00:10:28,500
(muffled talking)

244
00:10:36,566 --> 00:10:39,033
(dispatch static)

245
00:10:39,033 --> 00:10:41,666
- [paramedic] He's never 
been known to use any?

246
00:10:41,666 --> 00:10:42,933
Heroine or opioids?

247
00:10:42,933 --> 00:10:44,633
I mean, he's not in trouble,

248
00:10:44,633 --> 00:10:46,200
it'll just help us 
treat him if we know.

249
00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:47,566
- [unknown woman] No.

250
00:10:47,566 --> 00:10:49,066
- [fireman] Where'd 
he'd get these?

251
00:10:49,066 --> 00:10:52,033
- [fireman] So we go 
on a heroine overdose

252
00:10:52,033 --> 00:10:54,066
is how they put it 
out on the radio.

253
00:10:54,066 --> 00:10:56,200
Unfortunately we've 
become so proficient

254
00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:59,733
at doing this we don't even 
have to talk to each other.

255
00:10:59,733 --> 00:11:00,833
You know one of 
the crew members,

256
00:11:00,833 --> 00:11:02,500
one of my guys asked me one day,

257
00:11:02,500 --> 00:11:05,266
"What is the difference 
between people living and

258
00:11:05,266 --> 00:11:08,100
"dying from a heroine overdose?"

259
00:11:08,100 --> 00:11:09,300
And I told him I said,

260
00:11:09,300 --> 00:11:10,966
"The only reason 
people live through

261
00:11:10,966 --> 00:11:12,366
"a heroine overdose is because

262
00:11:12,366 --> 00:11:15,533
"someone is there 
to call for them."

263
00:11:15,533 --> 00:11:18,000
When we find a person 
dead it is usually because

264
00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:20,466
no one was there 
with them to call.

265
00:11:20,466 --> 00:11:23,200
They stop breathing, 
their heart stops beating,

266
00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:25,466
and they pretty much 
die and go to sleep.

267
00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,100
I mean, we found people

268
00:11:28,100 --> 00:11:33,066
that were blue, no breaths 
at all, heart rate 150,

269
00:11:34,500 --> 00:11:36,333
and that surviving patient 
we can administer the

270
00:11:36,333 --> 00:11:39,933
Narcan start to pushing it 
into their system through IV

271
00:11:41,566 --> 00:11:44,533
and easily enough they sit up,

272
00:11:45,566 --> 00:11:47,400
"What happened?"

273
00:11:47,400 --> 00:11:50,533
And they're never, they've 
never used heroine.

274
00:11:50,533 --> 00:11:52,700
This is always the thing,

275
00:11:52,700 --> 00:11:54,300
"I didn't use heroine."

276
00:11:54,300 --> 00:11:55,566
We know.

277
00:11:55,566 --> 00:11:57,100
It's hard to admit, 
for these people,

278
00:11:57,100 --> 00:11:59,700
that they used and that 
they're in this position,

279
00:11:59,700 --> 00:12:01,333
but we know.

280
00:12:04,566 --> 00:12:06,033
- Drugs in rural areas 
are actually making

281
00:12:06,033 --> 00:12:09,433
what once was a very safe 
place, more dangerous.

282
00:12:09,433 --> 00:12:11,466
Everybody thinks that drugs are

283
00:12:11,466 --> 00:12:13,200
only in the cities or suburbs

284
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:16,100
but in reality, they're 
out in the country.

285
00:12:16,100 --> 00:12:18,466
(foot steps)

286
00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:21,400
- [paramedic] Check his pupils.

287
00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:23,500
See if he's breathing 
and he's got a pulse.

288
00:12:25,100 --> 00:12:26,900
[Offscreen] The training 
for this is very important

289
00:12:26,900 --> 00:12:28,466
because we want to 
fight how we train

290
00:12:28,466 --> 00:12:30,000
and train how we fight.

291
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,966
A lot of that goes for how 
realistic the training is

292
00:12:32,966 --> 00:12:35,200
and how you can actually 
make a difference.

293
00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:37,000
So what you saw was 
my partner and I

294
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:39,700
going in from being 
dispatched into

295
00:12:39,700 --> 00:12:41,633
confirming that it 
was a heroine overdose

296
00:12:41,633 --> 00:12:43,700
or some form of opiod overdose.

297
00:12:43,700 --> 00:12:44,933
Administrating the Narcan,

298
00:12:44,933 --> 00:12:47,366
performing the bag 
valve ventilations.

299
00:12:47,366 --> 00:12:49,400
Waking them up and 
trying to keep them calm

300
00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:52,100
to the point that they 
understand what's going on.

301
00:12:52,100 --> 00:12:55,533
In the rural setting, drugs 
could range from heroine,

302
00:12:55,533 --> 00:12:59,700
to fentanyl, to 
methamphetamines, cocaine...

303
00:12:59,700 --> 00:13:01,400
But what a lot of people 
don't think about is

304
00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:03,200
the pills that are in 
our medicine cabinets

305
00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:04,700
that are prescribed to us.

306
00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:06,866
A lot of people are abusing 
things like the oxycodone,

307
00:13:06,866 --> 00:13:09,466
morphine, gabapentin is 
one of them that's been

308
00:13:09,466 --> 00:13:11,766
pretty big these days.

309
00:13:11,766 --> 00:13:13,233
Okay answer this 
honestly we are not

310
00:13:13,233 --> 00:13:14,266
the police I need to know

311
00:13:14,266 --> 00:13:17,300
have you taken any drugs today?

312
00:13:17,300 --> 00:13:20,333
- I think as macho 
men no one really

313
00:13:20,333 --> 00:13:23,266
wants to address, they 
don't want to admit

314
00:13:23,266 --> 00:13:25,866
that these things bother them.

315
00:13:27,266 --> 00:13:31,900
Over the years you've seen 
guys fall victim to alcoholism.

316
00:13:31,900 --> 00:13:36,866
I've seen, since I've 
been on, known 5,

317
00:13:40,166 --> 00:13:44,700
maybe 6 guys that have 
committed suicide.

318
00:13:44,700 --> 00:13:47,033
- Many of us, personal 
friends of mine,

319
00:13:47,033 --> 00:13:49,266
myself, you know, 
we have problems

320
00:13:49,266 --> 00:13:52,200
with alcoholism, drug 
abuse, ourselves.

321
00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:56,433
We have, very few of us 
have positive outlets for it

322
00:13:56,433 --> 00:13:58,766
because it's tough to develop.

323
00:13:58,766 --> 00:14:03,300
I mean this isn't stress 
from work in an office.

324
00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:06,766
This is seeing people die and 
having lives in our hands.

325
00:14:06,766 --> 00:14:07,933
- (chuckles) I mean you can see

326
00:14:07,933 --> 00:14:08,866
I've put on a little 
bit of weight,

327
00:14:08,866 --> 00:14:10,066
since I've been doing this,

328
00:14:10,066 --> 00:14:12,633
so, you know, unhealthy 
habits eating-wise,

329
00:14:12,633 --> 00:14:14,700
drinking is a very 
easy one to get into,

330
00:14:14,700 --> 00:14:17,100
thankfully I never 
got way into that,

331
00:14:17,100 --> 00:14:18,600
but I've definitely 
had those nights

332
00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:20,700
where you get home and you 
have a couple too many.

333
00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:23,233
And definitely many peers.

334
00:14:23,233 --> 00:14:25,600
I've had peers who have 
overdosed in the past,

335
00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:28,733
guys that struggle with 
alcohol use all the time,

336
00:14:28,733 --> 00:14:31,433
you know, I'm grateful that I 
didn't fall into those depths

337
00:14:31,433 --> 00:14:34,433
and I was able, I have a good 
support group that caught me.

338
00:14:34,433 --> 00:14:36,600
- All right so tonight we're 
covering mental health and EMS.

339
00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:38,533
I've been seeing things over 
the past couple of years

340
00:14:38,533 --> 00:14:40,133
and wanted to kind of 
get this topic started

341
00:14:40,133 --> 00:14:42,366
so I've been doing stuff 
the past five or six months,

342
00:14:42,366 --> 00:14:44,133
kind of looking into this.

343
00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:47,900
If you guys want to give me 
your thoughts and opinions

344
00:14:47,900 --> 00:14:49,766
throughout the 
class just pipe up.

345
00:14:49,766 --> 00:14:51,033
The more interactive we have it,

346
00:14:51,033 --> 00:14:54,433
the easier it is and 
the more fun it is.

347
00:14:54,433 --> 00:14:57,400
The topic of mental health had 
been on my mind for a while

348
00:14:57,400 --> 00:15:00,400
and in May I lost 
one of my bosses,

349
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:04,866
at the other agency that I 
work for, to suicide and...

350
00:15:04,866 --> 00:15:06,900
Totally unexpected 
nobody saw it coming,

351
00:15:06,900 --> 00:15:08,433
nobody saw the warning signs,

352
00:15:08,433 --> 00:15:11,533
and that kind of made 
me jump into the,

353
00:15:11,533 --> 00:15:12,666
"let's look into this",

354
00:15:12,666 --> 00:15:14,400
"let's start 
talking about this".

355
00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:17,100
I created a survey 
which almost 250 people

356
00:15:17,100 --> 00:15:20,666
filled out that sort 
of lead up to the class

357
00:15:20,666 --> 00:15:22,200
that I taught on mental health.

358
00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:24,633
A few months ago one 
of my co-workers said,

359
00:15:24,633 --> 00:15:26,333
"Yeah we know we're 
all messed up,

360
00:15:26,333 --> 00:15:27,566
"why are we talking about this?

361
00:15:27,566 --> 00:15:29,733
"Why do we need to 
know that, you know,

362
00:15:29,733 --> 00:15:32,600
"we all have issues 
about these calls?"

363
00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:35,933
So I kind of wanted to 
get the discussion going

364
00:15:35,933 --> 00:15:39,866
and a lot of stigma 
about mental health and

365
00:15:39,866 --> 00:15:43,033
not being able to 
talk to people.

366
00:15:43,033 --> 00:15:44,266
You know.

367
00:15:44,266 --> 00:15:45,066
Here it says there's 
no shame in admitting

368
00:15:45,066 --> 00:15:46,300
that you're human.

369
00:15:46,300 --> 00:15:48,433
I'm trying to bring 
about some discussion

370
00:15:48,433 --> 00:15:50,000
and make it so that 
(drowned out by speaker)

371
00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:52,066
- To watch an eighteen 
or twenty year old,

372
00:15:52,066 --> 00:15:56,666
their life slip away, and they 
had everything going for them

373
00:15:56,666 --> 00:15:59,533
in the world other 
than this issue,

374
00:15:59,533 --> 00:16:01,833
and now they've lost their life.

375
00:16:01,833 --> 00:16:03,033
You can't fathom that.

376
00:16:03,033 --> 00:16:05,100
You can't wrap 
your head around it

377
00:16:05,100 --> 00:16:09,366
and realizing how much 
it effects their families

378
00:16:09,366 --> 00:16:13,266
and themselves and watching 
the death toll rise.

379
00:16:13,266 --> 00:16:16,233
It takes a huge chunk 
of your mental health

380
00:16:16,233 --> 00:16:20,833
not being able to do 
anything about it.

381
00:16:20,833 --> 00:16:25,766
But to see young kids dying 
is probably the worst.

382
00:16:25,766 --> 00:16:28,200
- This is going to 
take a toll not only

383
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:33,133
on, you know, their 
career, but them personally

384
00:16:33,133 --> 00:16:35,866
and one of the biggest 
concerns we have is,

385
00:16:35,866 --> 00:16:39,000
not only are we just seeing 
people dying unnecessarily,

386
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:41,466
we're going to lose a 
group of professionals

387
00:16:41,466 --> 00:16:44,033
because their careers 
will be cut short

388
00:16:44,033 --> 00:16:48,666
because repeated trauma 
like this and seeing it over

389
00:16:48,666 --> 00:16:50,266
and over and over again?

390
00:16:53,100 --> 00:16:54,466
Burns people out.

391
00:16:54,466 --> 00:16:56,533
You can't go to work 
everyday knowing

392
00:16:56,533 --> 00:16:58,133
that you're going to 
see a young person,

393
00:16:58,133 --> 00:17:00,300
who has no other 
medical problems

394
00:17:00,300 --> 00:17:02,500
other than struggling 
with whatever chemical

395
00:17:02,500 --> 00:17:04,700
that they're 
struggling with, die.

396
00:17:04,700 --> 00:17:06,800
That's not something that 
you can have happen to you

397
00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:09,066
everyday in your 
career and expect that

398
00:17:09,066 --> 00:17:12,366
it isn't going to change 
you, and shorten what you do

399
00:17:12,366 --> 00:17:14,266
from a career standpoint.

400
00:17:14,266 --> 00:17:16,600
- I find myself in 
a unique situation.

401
00:17:16,600 --> 00:17:19,000
My son, Cody, died from 
a heroine overdose.

402
00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:21,466
I work in the busiest 
company in the city

403
00:17:21,466 --> 00:17:23,533
that deals with 
heroine overdoses.

404
00:17:23,533 --> 00:17:26,000
- I remember it like 
it was yesterday

405
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:28,866
I got a phone call 
from a friend of mine

406
00:17:28,866 --> 00:17:30,800
who was working 
at the fire house

407
00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:33,166
that responded to 
Cody's overdose

408
00:17:33,166 --> 00:17:36,500
and told me that he had died.

409
00:17:36,500 --> 00:17:39,966
- Cody got, I believe, 
addicted to heroine

410
00:17:39,966 --> 00:17:41,800
because when he was 
in twelfth grade

411
00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:44,266
he broke his foot in football

412
00:17:44,266 --> 00:17:45,933
and they prescribed 
him pain medication

413
00:17:45,933 --> 00:17:48,500
which ultimately 
lead to an addiction.

414
00:17:48,500 --> 00:17:49,966
Then when he was 
working at Pizza Hut

415
00:17:49,966 --> 00:17:51,800
his manager decided, 
"hey, I got something

416
00:17:51,800 --> 00:17:52,700
"cheaper that works 
just as good",

417
00:17:52,700 --> 00:17:54,333
and that was it.

418
00:17:54,333 --> 00:17:56,233
Once you do it you're hooked.

419
00:17:56,233 --> 00:17:58,300
- I don't know how 
he does his job.

420
00:17:58,300 --> 00:18:00,766
I don't know how he gets 
up everyday and comes here

421
00:18:00,766 --> 00:18:03,700
and he's constantly reminded 
not just from our calls

422
00:18:03,700 --> 00:18:05,500
but from calls 
throughout the city.

423
00:18:06,900 --> 00:18:10,433
Overdose calls, you know, 
people unresponsive.

424
00:18:10,433 --> 00:18:12,566
I don't know how he does it.

425
00:18:12,566 --> 00:18:15,500
I think his desire 
to help people,

426
00:18:15,500 --> 00:18:18,800
and maybe save 
someone else's life,

427
00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:20,166
that's what motivates him,

428
00:18:20,166 --> 00:18:21,900
and I think that's 
what drives him,

429
00:18:21,900 --> 00:18:24,600
is just the hope 
and just the prayer

430
00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:26,366
that he could help someone else

431
00:18:26,366 --> 00:18:28,933
because he wasn't 
able to be there

432
00:18:28,933 --> 00:18:31,733
for his son through 
his overdose.

433
00:18:34,966 --> 00:18:38,100
- My brother, Shawn, he was 
seven years older than I was.

434
00:18:38,100 --> 00:18:40,000
His addiction started 
because of an injury,

435
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:43,400
serval years before 
the big issue started.

436
00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:45,600
He broke his ankle,

437
00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:48,133
and they started prescribing 
him the oxycodone.

438
00:18:48,133 --> 00:18:49,366
The different pain medications

439
00:18:49,366 --> 00:18:51,233
to help him get 
through the injury

440
00:18:51,233 --> 00:18:52,300
and that kid of got him started

441
00:18:52,300 --> 00:18:55,600
on the path of getting addicted.

442
00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:56,866
1408 copy.

443
00:18:56,866 --> 00:18:59,200
CPR in progress with 
one Narcan on board.

444
00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:01,966
When my pager went off, I got 
up just like I normally did

445
00:19:01,966 --> 00:19:04,333
because I wanted to 
go help somebody.

446
00:19:04,333 --> 00:19:05,800
1408 copy.

447
00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:08,666
CPR still in progress 
with two rounds of Narcan.

448
00:19:08,666 --> 00:19:11,133
Fortunately stopped myself 
before I got to the front door

449
00:19:11,133 --> 00:19:13,300
and realized that was 
my brother in there.

450
00:19:13,300 --> 00:19:14,800
And there was other 
people responding

451
00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:17,066
and I said, "that's my brother 
I'm not going in there."

452
00:19:17,066 --> 00:19:19,600
Knowing that I can't see that.

453
00:19:19,600 --> 00:19:21,800
Because I know I'd never 
be able to unsee it.

454
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:23,700
They worked on him in the house.

455
00:19:23,700 --> 00:19:27,400
Tried Narcan, they gave him 
an IV, they intubated him,

456
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,733
got him in the ambulance and 
took him to the hospital.

457
00:19:29,733 --> 00:19:32,233
And I knew he wasn't 
coming out of it.

458
00:19:32,233 --> 00:19:35,300
So now it was about how do 
I go and handle my parents?

459
00:19:35,300 --> 00:19:37,766
And how do I handle 
basically getting ready

460
00:19:37,766 --> 00:19:39,633
for my brothers death?

461
00:19:39,633 --> 00:19:42,100
It really didn't 
affect me until,

462
00:19:43,300 --> 00:19:44,800
I'd say probably about 
three months after,

463
00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:45,966
after the funeral was all done,

464
00:19:45,966 --> 00:19:48,500
after the condolences were done,

465
00:19:48,500 --> 00:19:50,633
kind of getting back into life.

466
00:19:50,633 --> 00:19:52,333
I went on a call with 
one of our paramedics

467
00:19:52,333 --> 00:19:54,033
that ended up turning 
into cardiac arrest,

468
00:19:54,033 --> 00:19:55,966
and as soon as I was doing 
CPR on the individual,

469
00:19:55,966 --> 00:19:59,266
I look down and all 
I can visually see 
is my brothers face.

470
00:19:59,266 --> 00:20:01,500
So I felt like I was 
doing CPR on my brother

471
00:20:01,500 --> 00:20:04,466
and I think it was just a subtle 
message in my brain saying,

472
00:20:04,466 --> 00:20:06,700
"you're not dealing with 
this appropriately."

473
00:20:06,700 --> 00:20:08,566
And that really messed 
with me to the point that

474
00:20:08,566 --> 00:20:12,933
I actually was on the hairline 
of quitting EMS as a whole.

475
00:20:12,933 --> 00:20:14,733
And that's when I 
went and got help,

476
00:20:14,733 --> 00:20:16,600
and said, "something 
is definitely wrong".

477
00:20:16,600 --> 00:20:18,000
And if it wasn't 
for my co workers,

478
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,700
or the volunteers here, 
pushing me, saying,

479
00:20:20,700 --> 00:20:21,633
"Go get some help,"

480
00:20:21,633 --> 00:20:23,600
I probably wouldn't be here.

481
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:25,066
- This used to be a business.

482
00:20:25,066 --> 00:20:26,300
Especially when I first 
started, where it was very,

483
00:20:26,300 --> 00:20:27,600
there was a lot of 
machismo, you know,

484
00:20:27,600 --> 00:20:29,533
it was very alpha, you know,

485
00:20:29,533 --> 00:20:31,900
you weren't allowed to be 
affected by this stuff.

486
00:20:31,900 --> 00:20:33,333
Thankfully that's 
starting to change.

487
00:20:33,333 --> 00:20:34,933
It's becoming more 
okay to talk about

488
00:20:34,933 --> 00:20:37,800
the fact that these 
things do wear on you.

489
00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:39,566
Personally, I see a therapist.

490
00:20:39,566 --> 00:20:42,233
I have been diagnosed with PTSD.

491
00:20:42,233 --> 00:20:43,833
I'm not ashamed 
to talk about it.

492
00:20:43,833 --> 00:20:46,900
I take medications and 
I talk about this stuff.

493
00:20:46,900 --> 00:20:48,433
- Lately there's been 
a lot of talk about

494
00:20:48,433 --> 00:20:50,466
PTSD amongst the 
fire department,

495
00:20:50,466 --> 00:20:52,166
police department, 
fist responders.

496
00:20:52,166 --> 00:20:54,966
I think this is the first 
time that people are starting

497
00:20:54,966 --> 00:20:59,866
to recognize that PTSD doesn't 
have to be a one time event.

498
00:20:59,866 --> 00:21:03,400
It is actually an accumulative 
event of tragic things

499
00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:05,900
you've seen in your life and 
things that have happened.

500
00:21:05,900 --> 00:21:07,333
Whether you're in the military,

501
00:21:07,333 --> 00:21:10,300
you're a police officer, you're 
an EMT, or a firefighter.

502
00:21:10,300 --> 00:21:12,533
I'm sure doctors 
and nurses have it.

503
00:21:12,533 --> 00:21:15,466
I think a lot more people that 
are in the service industry

504
00:21:15,466 --> 00:21:20,433
and help people that are in 
need may have PTSD at some level

505
00:21:21,633 --> 00:21:25,933
because it is taxing to 
see people suffering.

506
00:21:27,066 --> 00:21:29,733
- [paramedic] Hey there 
how are you doing?

507
00:21:29,733 --> 00:21:31,266
You nodded off there.

508
00:21:31,266 --> 00:21:32,666
- [unknown woman] Yeah.

509
00:21:32,666 --> 00:21:33,666
- [paramedic] Yeah 
you nodded off.

510
00:21:33,666 --> 00:21:35,266
How much did you use?

511
00:21:35,266 --> 00:21:36,200
- [unknown woman] 
(slurring) What do you mean?

512
00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:37,200
- [paramedic] Couple bags?

513
00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:38,333
- [unknown women] Yeah.

514
00:21:38,333 --> 00:21:39,900
- [paramedic] All right.

515
00:21:39,900 --> 00:21:41,733
Did you get anything?

516
00:21:41,733 --> 00:21:43,533
- [paramedic] 128 on 72.

517
00:21:43,533 --> 00:21:44,466
- [paramedic] That's good.

518
00:21:44,466 --> 00:21:46,633
(dispatch beeping)

519
00:21:46,633 --> 00:21:51,566
- What I hear in the stories 
of first responders is that,

520
00:21:52,766 --> 00:21:57,300
we don't want to admit 
our own suffering.

521
00:21:57,300 --> 00:22:01,000
And there's a kind of 
vulnerability that comes

522
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:05,133
with saying this is really hard.

523
00:22:05,133 --> 00:22:08,300
And it's really 
weighing me down.

524
00:22:09,433 --> 00:22:11,766
If we can do that in community

525
00:22:11,766 --> 00:22:16,666
and make it an acknowledgement 
of our humanity,

526
00:22:16,666 --> 00:22:21,633
that we are human beings and 
that actually it's expected,

527
00:22:22,833 --> 00:22:25,966
as a human being, that 
we are going to have

528
00:22:25,966 --> 00:22:28,000
these kinds of responses.

529
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:31,400
Can help people be 
able to release it,

530
00:22:31,400 --> 00:22:35,333
rather than to have it 
accumulate day after day,

531
00:22:35,333 --> 00:22:38,533
week after week, 
month after month,

532
00:22:38,533 --> 00:22:42,000
in a way that eventually 
causes burn out.

533
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:42,933
(engine idling)

534
00:22:42,933 --> 00:22:43,733
- [paramedic] It's okay dear.

535
00:22:43,733 --> 00:22:45,300
Hold my hand.

536
00:22:45,300 --> 00:22:46,133
(woman crying)

537
00:22:46,133 --> 00:22:47,466
It's okay.

538
00:22:47,466 --> 00:22:48,700
It's okay.

539
00:22:48,700 --> 00:22:49,933
- [unknown woman] Sorry.

540
00:22:49,933 --> 00:22:51,300
- [paramedic] No, don't 
be sorry, it's okay.

541
00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:55,533
It's okay.

542
00:22:55,533 --> 00:22:57,100
(woman crying)

543
00:22:57,100 --> 00:22:58,700
Slowly in through your nose 
and out through your mouth.

544
00:22:58,700 --> 00:22:59,566
There you go honey.

545
00:23:00,866 --> 00:23:02,700
Just relax it's 
going to be okay.

546
00:23:02,700 --> 00:23:04,800
You're not in any trouble.

547
00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:06,533
She said she did 
a couple of bags,

548
00:23:06,533 --> 00:23:08,333
she's been clean 
for a little while,

549
00:23:08,333 --> 00:23:10,300
but she's real upset right now.

550
00:23:10,300 --> 00:23:11,233
- [paramedic] Did you 
guys give her anything?

551
00:23:13,466 --> 00:23:15,766
No, she's got a needle 
on top of her purse.

552
00:23:18,700 --> 00:23:22,233
- [unknown woman] 
(gasping) I'm sorry.

553
00:23:22,233 --> 00:23:24,833
- [paramedic] It's 
okay. It's okay.

554
00:23:24,833 --> 00:23:25,900
It's going to be okay.

555
00:23:25,900 --> 00:23:28,066
(woman crying)

556
00:23:28,066 --> 00:23:29,400
Just breathe.

557
00:23:29,400 --> 00:23:32,700
(woman breathing)

558
00:23:32,700 --> 00:23:37,533
- How is it that we take 
people who sought out this work

559
00:23:37,533 --> 00:23:41,033
because of their compassion, 
because of their big hearts,

560
00:23:41,033 --> 00:23:44,166
and put them in situations 
that are devastating?

561
00:23:44,166 --> 00:23:48,500
That an over time have 
accumulative effect upon

562
00:23:48,500 --> 00:23:51,766
how they feel physically, 
how they feel emotionally

563
00:23:51,766 --> 00:23:54,600
and also on their mind set 
how they see the world?

564
00:23:54,600 --> 00:23:58,533
They see things that don't fit 
at times with their beliefs

565
00:23:58,533 --> 00:24:00,400
about how things should go,

566
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:02,000
and that can be very difficult

567
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:04,600
for people to process 
and make sense of.

568
00:24:04,600 --> 00:24:07,066
So ultimately what 
seems to help people,

569
00:24:07,066 --> 00:24:09,533
is if they find 
someway of making

570
00:24:09,533 --> 00:24:11,433
the meaning of the experience

571
00:24:11,433 --> 00:24:14,733
and trying to either improve 
the system in some way,

572
00:24:14,733 --> 00:24:17,000
or help others that 
have been affected.

573
00:24:17,000 --> 00:24:19,733
That seems to be a 
critical part of healing

574
00:24:19,733 --> 00:24:22,233
in the face of all this trauma

575
00:24:22,233 --> 00:24:25,266
and sadness that 
healers experience.

576
00:24:25,266 --> 00:24:27,866
- I do remember coming to, 
aspirating and vomiting,

577
00:24:27,866 --> 00:24:32,666
and seeing his face carrying 
me down these stairs.

578
00:24:32,666 --> 00:24:35,033
Two fire fighters were 
down in front of me

579
00:24:35,033 --> 00:24:36,533
with his arms 
underneath me, hooked,

580
00:24:36,533 --> 00:24:38,000
and then I went back out

581
00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:39,933
and I woke back up 
in the ambulance.

582
00:24:41,700 --> 00:24:44,566
- Krista is a person 
that we saved,

583
00:24:44,566 --> 00:24:48,800
on Orchard street, I 
believe the street was.

584
00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:50,666
She was friends with Cody.

585
00:24:50,666 --> 00:24:53,633
- [Krista] John and Carrie 
Vagg and their daughters

586
00:24:53,633 --> 00:24:55,133
came to my wedding,

587
00:24:55,133 --> 00:24:58,500
and I got to share the best 
day of my life with them,

588
00:24:58,500 --> 00:25:01,600
and I would not be 
here without John.

589
00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:02,833
I wouldn't have my son.

590
00:25:02,833 --> 00:25:04,466
I have a one year old 
who's never seen me use.

591
00:25:04,466 --> 00:25:06,833
I have a beautiful 
husband and a home

592
00:25:06,833 --> 00:25:09,100
and that's not where 
I was five years ago.

593
00:25:09,100 --> 00:25:11,300
I was in jail and I had nobody.

594
00:25:11,300 --> 00:25:13,766
- [John] I've seen you know one,

595
00:25:13,766 --> 00:25:15,566
(pastor speaking)

596
00:25:15,566 --> 00:25:18,433
good story in 200, you know.

597
00:25:19,333 --> 00:25:21,066
The odds are so slim,

598
00:25:21,066 --> 00:25:22,966
that somebody 
actually makes it out

599
00:25:22,966 --> 00:25:25,000
and makes something 
of their life.

600
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:28,000
I'm very impressed to see 
that but I always worry.

601
00:25:28,966 --> 00:25:30,900
As stressful as this job can be,

602
00:25:30,900 --> 00:25:33,433
that's what keeps 
me going personally.

603
00:25:33,433 --> 00:25:38,400
Our hope that we can affect 
somebodies life positively

604
00:25:39,166 --> 00:25:40,600
and there's always hope.

605
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:43,566
I say it all the time, 
that hopes springs eternal!

606
00:25:43,566 --> 00:25:45,566
And you never know what 
it is that can help them.

607
00:25:45,566 --> 00:25:47,500
Maybe it's just a kind word,

608
00:25:47,500 --> 00:25:50,333
maybe it's a pat on 
the back, saying,

609
00:25:50,333 --> 00:25:52,033
"you can do this, you 
can help yourself,

610
00:25:52,033 --> 00:25:54,033
"you can get fixed," you know,

611
00:25:54,033 --> 00:25:55,933
and you never know 
and we'll never know

612
00:25:55,933 --> 00:25:57,600
and we don't ever find out,

613
00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:00,233
for the most part, if 
someone's helped themselves or

614
00:26:00,233 --> 00:26:04,566
made it out of this debilitating 
crisis that they're in.

615
00:26:04,566 --> 00:26:05,400
(firetruck siren)

616
00:26:05,400 --> 00:26:07,433
But there's always hope.

617
00:26:07,433 --> 00:26:10,433
(gentle piano music)

618
00:26:10,433 --> 00:26:13,000
(firetruck sirens)

619
00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:16,066
(gentle piano music)