WEBVTT

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>> Hill: WE'VE BEEN BRINGING YOU

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A SERIES OF STORIES TOLD BY

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INDIGENOUS PEOPLE FROM

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YELLOWKNIFE IN CANADA'S

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NORTHWEST TERRITORY.

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IN PARTNERSHIP WITH THE GLOBAL

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REPORTING CENTER, THEY'RE

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SHARING THEIR STORIES OF LIFE,

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ADDICTION AND RECOVERY.

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DONALD PRINCE IS A COUNSELOR AND

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THE FORMER EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR OF

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THE ARCTIC INDIGENOUS WELLNESS

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FOUNDATION.

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IN THIS FIRST PERSON STORY, HE

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SHARES HIS PAST EXPERIENCES WITH

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VIOLENCE, THE JUSTICE SYSTEM,

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AND ADDICTION; AND HOW BEING A

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FATHER AND WRITING POETRY WERE

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CRUCIAL STEPS TOWARDS HIS

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HEALING.

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♪ ♪ ♪

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>> I WALKED THROUGH THE EMPTY

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CITY.

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MY SOUL IS HURT AND TORN.

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I'M SURROUNDED BY LONELINESS.

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WHY WAS I EVEN BORN?

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I WISH I COULD FIND A WAY OUT OF

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THIS WORLD OF VIOLENCE.

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I CRY OUT AT NIGHT AND I HEAR

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ONLY THE SILENCE.

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I REMEMBER I WAS ABOUT PROBABLY

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TEN YEARS OLD, JUST WHEN I

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STARTED SCHOOL, I STARTED

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DRINKING.

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THE FEELINGS OF FEAR AND

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INSECURITY AND NOT FEELING A

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PART OF, AND... ALL THIS OTHER

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STUFF, SORT OF, WENT AWAY WHEN I

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DRANK.

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FIGHTS, I REMEMBER A LOT OF

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FIGHTS.

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MY DAD WAS A BIG GUY, SO HE WAS

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ALWAYS SCREAMING AND YELLING AND

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DIFFERENT THINGS LIKE THAT, THE

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COPS COMING.

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REALITY, DIRTY BREATH IN HIS

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FACE.

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HE'S BACK IN LINE.

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THOUGHTS GONE, FOOD'S COMING.

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BOY, I'M SURE HUNGRY.

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BEEN STANDING IN LINE FOR YEARS.

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HOPE THEY DON'T SEE ME.

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I USED TO GET PICKED ON IN

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SCHOOL BY ALL THESE BULLIES.

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THEY USED TO WAIT FOR US.

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AND THE BIGGEST GUY, THEY CAME

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AFTER ME AND I STABBED HIM IN

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THE FACE.

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I CUT HIM RIGHT FROM HIS MOUTH

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RIGHT UP TO HIS EAR.

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THE COPS CAME, THEY PICKED ME UP

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THAT NIGHT AND THREW ME IN JAIL.

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HE STANDS IN THE LINE AND HIDES

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HIS FACE.

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KEEPING UP TO THE OTHERS,

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DOESN'T LOSE HIS PLACE.

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HE STARES AT THE HOLES IN HIS

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SHOES.

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DIRTY PANTS, STALE SHIRT.

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HEY, MOVE IT, BUDDY.

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WHAT ARE YOU DREAMING ABOUT,

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WINE?

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ENDED UP IN JAIL AGAIN, '89, BUT

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THESE COUPLE OF GUARDS, THEY

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SAID, "PRINCE, WHEN IN THE HELL

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ARE YOU GOING TO LEARN, WHEN

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YOU'RE GOING TO SMARTEN UP," YOU

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KNOW?

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I SAID, "YEAH, YEAH, BUT I DON'T

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KNOW WHAT THE HELL," I THOUGHT,

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"I SEEMED LIKE I CAN'T.

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I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL'S

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GOING ON WITH ME."

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SO ANYWAY, ONE OF THEM SAID,

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"WELL, WHY DON'T YOU START

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WRITING SOME OF THIS STUFF DOWN?

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WRITE IT OUT."

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AND I THOUGHT, "OKAY."

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SO, I WENT BACK AND I STARTED

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WRITING, AND I WROTE ABOUT HOW I

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FELT ABOUT LOVE AND ABOUT HATE

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AND ABOUT ANGER AND WISHING FOR

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A BETTER LIFE AND WISHING FOR A

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LOVE THAT WAS TRUE OR WISHING

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FOR, YOU KNOW, HAVE MY KIDS IN

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MY LIFE AND THINGS LIKE THAT,

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RIGHT?

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WELL, I REMEMBER WHEN MY OLDEST

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DAUGHTER, CRYSTAL, WAS BORN, I

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JUST HELD HER AND LOOKED AT HER

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AND I SAID, "I WILL NEVER DO THE

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THINGS TO YOU THAT WERE DONE TO

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ME," AND I NEVER DID.

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FOR THE FIRST 14, 15 YEARS OF

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HER LIFE, I WAS NEVER THERE

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MUCH.

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ONE TIME PAULA WAS IN JAIL.

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THE GUARD COMES UP TO ME AND

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SAYS, "YOUR DAUGHTER PHONED,

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THERE'S AN EMERGENCY.

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SHE SAID THAT AMANDA GOT RUN

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OVER."

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AMANDA, MY YOUNGER DAUGHTER, SHE

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WAS FIVE YEARS OLD.

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SO, I'M ON THE PHONE AND I SAID,

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"WELL, IS SHE OKAY?"

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AND ALL I CAN HEAR IS CRYING ON

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THE OTHER END.

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AND I THOUGHT, "SHE'S DEAD."

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I THOUGHT MY DAUGHTER WAS DEAD.

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FINALLY, CRYSTAL WAS ABLE TO

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TALK, AND SHE SAID, "NO, SHE'S

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IN PRETTY BAD SHAPE, SHE'S IN A

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HOSPITAL, BUT SHE'S GOING TO

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MAKE IT."

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BUT I REMEMBER GOING AND WALKING

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AWAY ON THAT PHONE CALL

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THINKING, YOU KNOW, "WHAT THE

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HELL KIND OF A DAD AM I?"

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YOU KNOW, MY KID'S 500 MILES

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AWAY, RAN OVER, THE OTHER ONE'S

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GETTING IN TROUBLE.

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WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?

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YOU KNOW, WHY?

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WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH ME?

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STRANGE, FOOLISH DESIRES.

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THEY COME OVER ME.

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I FEEL THE CHAINS TIGHTEN.

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I AM NO LONGER FREE.

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I WENT AND SAW THIS DRUG AND

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ALCOHOL COUNSELOR.

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HE SAYS, "WELL, I JUST WANT TO

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KNOW WHAT PEOPLE DID TO YOU."

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I SAID, "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?"

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HE SAID, "WHAT DID PEOPLE DO TO

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YOU WHEN YOU WERE A KID?"

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AND HOLY-- THAT BLEW ME AWAY.

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YOU KNOW, NOBODY EVER ASKED ME

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WHAT HAPPENED TO ME.

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YOU KNOW, THEY ALWAYS WANT TO

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KNOW WHAT A BAD GUY I WAS.

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AND... I LOOK BACK NOW, THAT WAS

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THE KEY.

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(<i>SIGHS</i>)

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THAT WAS THE KEY TO LOCKING

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ALL-- UNLOCKING ALL THAT

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BITTERNESS AND HATE, ANGER I HAD

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FOR THE WORLD.

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I HAVEN'T HAD A DRUG OR A DRINK

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SINCE.

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♪ ♪ ♪

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WE PROVIDE A PLACE WHERE PEOPLE

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CAN GET HELP, WHETHER THAT BE

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COUNSELING, OR TRADITIONAL

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HEALING, OR TRADITIONAL

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MEDICINE, CEREMONIES, DIFFERENT

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THINGS LIKE THAT.

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WE DON'T FOLLOW ANY WESTERN WAY

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OF DOING THINGS, WE DO THINGS

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OUR WAY, THE INDIAN WAY.

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(<i>LAUGHS</i>)

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WE DON'T HAVE ANYBODY WHO WORKS

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HERE WAS NOT ABORIGINAL.

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>> EVERY TRIBE HAS THEIR OWN

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MEDICINES AND THEIR OWN LAND,

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YOU KNOW, SO WE UTILIZE OUR OWN

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MEDICINES HERE.

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WE KNOW THAT PEOPLE ARE GOING

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THROUGH A LOT OF PAIN AND

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THEY'RE FEELING SO GOOD WHEN

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THEY LEAVE HERE.

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>> WESTERN COUNSELING THE WAY

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IT'S SET UP, YOU GOT TO GO INTO

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A COUNSELING SESSION.

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YOU SPEAK FOR 50 MINUTES OR

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SOMETHING LIKE THAT AND THAT'S

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IT.

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OUT HERE, ANYBODY CAN COME ANY

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TIME THEY WANT FOR AS LONG AS

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THEY WANT.

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TALK WITH SOMEBODY FOR A LITTLE

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WHILE, GO HAVE SOMETHING TO EAT,

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RELAX A LITTLE BIT, TALK AGAIN.

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WHEN PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO BE

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WHAT THEY ARE, SAY WHAT THEY

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WANT AND DO WHAT THEY WANT,

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THEY'RE MORE LIKELY TO OPEN UP

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ABOUT SOMETHING THAT'S GOING ON

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WITH THEM.

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>> UNLIKE OTHER ORGANIZATIONS,

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THESE PEOPLE SAID, "COME ON,

06:28.500 --> 06:29.766 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
IT'S OKAY IF YOU FALL DOWN.

06:29.766 --> 06:30.966 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
COME JOIN US, SIT DOWN, HAVE

06:30.966 --> 06:34.100 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
COFFEE, HAVE TEA."

06:34.100 --> 06:36.233 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
DONALD IS A NO HOLDS-BARRED

06:36.233 --> 06:37.600 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
ELDER.

06:37.600 --> 06:39.300 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
HE'LL TELL YOU EXACTLY THE WAY

06:39.300 --> 06:40.466 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
IT IS.

06:40.466 --> 06:41.633 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
HE CARES SO MUCH FOR

06:41.633 --> 06:43.766 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
INDIVIDUALS.

06:43.766 --> 06:44.966 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
I LEARNED QUITE A BIT OFF OF

06:44.966 --> 06:46.000 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
HIM.

06:46.000 --> 06:47.100 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
I LEARNED HOW TO STAND UP FOR

06:47.100 --> 06:48.100 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
MYSELF THEN.

06:48.100 --> 06:49.266 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
GROWING UP IN RESIDENTIAL

06:49.266 --> 06:51.566 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
SCHOOL, YOUR VOICE, YOUR SPIRIT

06:51.566 --> 06:53.333 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
IS TAKEN AWAY, BUT WORKING WITH

06:53.333 --> 06:54.800 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
HIM AND IN THIS CAMP HAS GIVEN

06:54.800 --> 06:58.400 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
ME MY SPIRIT BACK.

06:58.400 --> 07:00.933 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
>> WHAT MOTIVATES ME IS SUCCESS,

07:00.933 --> 07:03.700 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
YOU KNOW, AND SEEING PEOPLE LIKE

07:03.700 --> 07:05.400 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
STANLEY OR INUK WHO ARE SOBER

07:05.400 --> 07:07.866 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
TODAY AND THEY HAVE GOOD LIVES.

07:07.866 --> 07:09.233 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
THEIR KIDS HAVE GOOD LIVES.

07:09.233 --> 07:12.833 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
THEIR GRANDKIDS HAVE GOOD LIVES.

07:12.833 --> 07:14.400 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
I'VE LET GO OF THE DARK SIDE.

07:14.400 --> 07:16.333 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
THERE'S GOING TO BE BETTER DAYS.

07:16.333 --> 07:17.833 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
THINGS ARE LOOKING BETTER NOW

07:17.833 --> 07:21.666 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
SINCE I'VE CHANGED MY EVIL WAYS.

07:21.666 --> 07:23.233 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
SOMETIMES THE TEMPTATION IS NOT

07:23.233 --> 07:24.300 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
EASY.

07:24.300 --> 07:26.100 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
IT'S HARD FOR ME TO ABIDE.

07:26.100 --> 07:27.366 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
BUT I DON'T LET IT GET ME DOWN,

07:27.366 --> 07:29.666 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
I JUST PUSH IT ALL ASIDE.

07:29.666 --> 07:31.366 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
I'M FOCUSING ON THE GOOD TIMES

07:31.366 --> 07:33.700 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
AND KEEPING AN OPEN MIND.

07:33.700 --> 07:35.333 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
I'M GOING TO LOOK AHEAD OF ME.

07:35.333 --> 07:35.900 align:left position:10%,start line:89% size:80%
THE PAST IS ALL BEHIND.