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- [Speaker] Why is it important 
to talk about disability

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and medicine?

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- Medicine's a part 
of our everyday life

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and disabilities are also 
a part of everyday life.

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- Many of us are sick, 
ill, or disabled.

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- I think there's 
some conflation

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between disability and disease

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that physicians are 
experts in disease

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and so therefore they 
should be knowledgeable

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about disabilities.

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- It's important for these 
two groups to get together

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so that they can 
bridge a connection.

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- You know, I always say 
bring a mother to the table

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and have these conversations.

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Bring a child to the table,

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you'll have these conversations.

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- When it comes to disability,

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I think there's 
many misconceptions.

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- "Oh, you don't look 
like somebody who's Blind

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or you don't look like 
somebody with disabilities."

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And I was like, "What is that?"

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- A lot of people 
have disabilities

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and it's a good thing to talk 
about that and normalize it

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because, you know, we're 
just like everybody else.

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(calm music)

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- [Announcer] This program

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was funded by the Minnesota 
Arts and Cultural Heritage Fund

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and the citizens of Minnesota.

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(calm music)

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- We often use art as a language

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or a conduit to 
our deeper selves,

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but art also 
provides a landscape

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where we can investigate 
and challenge personal

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and societal beliefs.

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Hi, I'm Kevin Kling.

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I'm a storyteller and an artist.

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- I'm Jessica Horvath Williams

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and I'm a disabled professor

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in English and 
Disability Studies.

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- My name is Tseganesh Selameab

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and I'm an internal 
medicine doctor.

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As medical providers,

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we are trained to 
strive towards restoring

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what we perceive as a 
normal body and mind.

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In reality, every 
person's experience

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of their body and 
mind is different

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and that reality 
is ever changing.

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- We know that in 
striving for normal,

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we by default lead to 
differences in power,

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inclusion and exclusion

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because it is not just 
defining what is normal,

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but who is normal.

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- People with disabilities

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may have challenges that 
change how they move

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or interact with the world,

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but that is no different 
than any other individual.

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- Disabled people form the 
largest minority population

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in the US.

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While many people are 
born with disabilities,

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anyone through disease, 
accident or injury

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can become disabled at any time.

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- And if we're fortunate 
to live long enough,

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we will all have changes 
to our hearing, vision,

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mobility or minds that can be 
understood as disabilities.

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Yet as a society,

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we persist in understanding 
disability as a problem

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rather than as a typical 
part of the human experience.

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- When we define a disability

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as the problem located 
in the individual

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that needs to be fixed by the 
individual and by medicine,

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we fail to examine how the 
way we understand disability

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is a social problem and how 
we have constructed a world

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that uses differences in ability

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to keep a whole 
community separate.

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- So how do we 
address this chasm?

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In this show, we'll 
explore how artists

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help to create alternative 
perspectives on disability

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through disability and redefine 
what we perceive as normal.

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- The way I think that art 
can connect with communities

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in particular 
medical communities

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is to see our stories 
told by us in our way.

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- Art connects communities 
through representation.

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- Through communication.

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- Art can help 
communicate with people

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and also other communities 
to help people understand.

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- It allows for the sharing 
of different cultures

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and perspectives

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and allows people to just kind 
of open up about their lives.

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- You get glimpses to 
other people's humanity.

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- Art exposes,

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art reveals what's happening

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behind the curtain.

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♪ There's a fire 
in the freezer ♪

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♪ There's some 
blood in the rose ♪

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♪ There's a broken 
puppet on the wall ♪

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♪ I just saw it's eyes glow

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♪ I thought it was 
just a limp machine ♪

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♪ That was damaged by the road

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♪ But he's awake 
now and I believe ♪

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♪ He's a toy no more

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♪ Broken puppet with 
your strings that fall ♪

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♪ Will you show me how 
you move on your own ♪

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♪ Cut loose like a ladybug

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♪ That's climbing out 
of its rabbit hole ♪

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♪ Free fallin' like 
a corporate rogue ♪

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♪ Will you tell me how 
you bleed on your own ♪

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When I was about three years 
old. I started playing piano.

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I actually recorded 
some music when I was 14

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and I was selling 
it to raise money

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for my trip to Costa Rica 
where I had my injury.

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I have a C5 spinal cord injury,

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so I don't have a 
lot of hand function.

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Three years into my injury,

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found out I could 
still make music.

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Started a band called 
Treading North.

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That band broke up 
and I started Freaque.

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♪ Pinocchio had it wrong

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♪ There's no such 
thing as real boys ♪

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♪ Try and try and try again

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♪ But we'll never fit the mold

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♪ The illusion of 
our freedom rings ♪

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♪ Over bodies that have coiled

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♪ They're drained of 
all their agency ♪

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♪ And deflated leaking joy

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I remember one night I was 
working on music on my computer,

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which is usually the way 
I write, and I was like,

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maybe I'll go downstairs 
and play the piano.

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It was this sort of cathartic,

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deep connection that I'd 
been missing for a long time

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with the piano.

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And so I was able to kind of 
reignite that relationship

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through writing, you know,

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one note at a time and it kind 
of gave me this new avenue,

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this new path to create.

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And I think since those songs 
are so sparse musically,

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I was really able to start 
experimenting with more poetry

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and more lyrics.

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♪ Broken puppet with 
your strings that fall ♪

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♪ Will you show me how 
you move on your own ♪

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♪ Cut loose like a ladybug

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♪ That's climbing out 
of its rabbit hole ♪

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♪ Free fallin' like 
a corporate rogue ♪

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♪ Will you tell me how 
you bleed on your own ♪

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♪ Feel on your own

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♪ Be on your own

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We took that idea of one 
note at a time to the extreme

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and realizing like, well,

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what if I do that 
with my old body?

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(suspenseful music)

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A Cripple's Dance 
is a live music,

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live dance production 
performed and created

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by people with 
spinal cord injuries.

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I would literally get 
on the floor on a mat

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and I would be moving down there

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and I have no movement 
below my armpits,

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so all I was doing

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was sort of gestural 
movements on the ground.

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And there's 
something really like

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really empowering about that.

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What they were gonna see 
was so deeply vulnerable.

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I wanted to bring them into that

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and invite them to be 
vulnerable themselves.

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It's not about letting 
your limitation

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limit you sort of,

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it's more about 
using the limitation

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to burst everything wide open

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and make magic through 
your limitations.

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All right, let's 
spread across the room

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and we're gonna do some 
solo anchoring exploration.

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- Cool.

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- I started at Young 
Dance in fall of 2021.

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As I started thinking about 
what we're doing in class

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and sort of taking a little 
bit more of a creative role,

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things have like really started 
to shift for me creatively.

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I think it comes in 
line with my excitement

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for more improv-based 
performance.

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- That was awesome.

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- That was awesome.

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(calm music)

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00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:20,233
- A thing I'm starting 
to discover about dance

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and I think it's been 
a process of discovery

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over the last few years.

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The way that I dance,

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the way that I move doesn't 
need to look a certain way,

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that's not just 
enough but exciting.

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00:10:32,133 --> 00:10:35,800
I think similarly 
that I can make music

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that sounds good

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or interesting to my own ears.

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00:10:40,366 --> 00:10:44,500
You know, my body is so 
different from the standard

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00:10:44,500 --> 00:10:47,900
and I wanna explore 
that and tell that story

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00:10:47,900 --> 00:10:49,966
because I think there are 
so many people out there

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00:10:49,966 --> 00:10:52,600
who are struggling 
with similar things

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00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:55,966
and it is this sort 
of like the floodgates

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are bursting wide 
open kind of feeling.

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00:10:58,900 --> 00:11:03,866
And I have no idea 
what is coming next,

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00:11:04,666 --> 00:11:05,700
but I know something's coming.

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00:11:05,700 --> 00:11:08,166
(calm music)

198
00:11:10,633 --> 00:11:11,533
- We

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00:11:12,566 --> 00:11:13,466
We

200
00:11:15,433 --> 00:11:16,433
We over...

201
00:11:16,433 --> 00:11:17,633
We are... 
We're...

202
00:11:17,633 --> 00:11:19,966
We overcome... 
We are...

203
00:11:19,966 --> 00:11:22,266
We are in whole 
wide, whole wide.

204
00:11:22,266 --> 00:11:25,133
We are deep in... 
We are deep, overcome

205
00:11:25,133 --> 00:11:27,933
There was all this debate 
about page versus stage

206
00:11:27,933 --> 00:11:33,000
and I was always thinking to 
myself, well, why can't...

207
00:11:34,133 --> 00:11:35,366
Why does it have to 
be one or the other?

208
00:11:35,366 --> 00:11:38,466
What happens if we turn 
the page into a stage?

209
00:11:38,466 --> 00:11:42,166
Someday, someday, some day...

210
00:11:42,166 --> 00:11:45,166
We, we are over... 
We are, we are...

211
00:11:45,166 --> 00:11:47,566
Is this what the wanted 
unwanted don't want.

212
00:11:47,566 --> 00:11:48,866
We are over... 
Some day...

213
00:11:48,866 --> 00:11:50,800
Oh, deep we are overcome...

214
00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:52,033
I! we are over...

215
00:11:52,033 --> 00:11:54,000
Someday, someday...

216
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:56,466
Ain't, what? Someday, ain't...

217
00:11:56,466 --> 00:12:00,033
Any designed piece of 
text that you read,

218
00:12:00,033 --> 00:12:01,900
whether it looks 
conventional or not,

219
00:12:01,900 --> 00:12:05,566
is self-consciously sort 
of scoring something.

220
00:12:05,566 --> 00:12:06,933
It's telling you how to read it.

221
00:12:06,933 --> 00:12:09,500
All over... 
Someday, someday, someday...

222
00:12:09,500 --> 00:12:11,166
Walloped up into dream upended

223
00:12:11,166 --> 00:12:13,433
and marched into 
houndstooth of knit elbows

224
00:12:13,433 --> 00:12:15,666
or garden of a 
million clenched buds,

225
00:12:15,666 --> 00:12:17,833
the doubled vox redouble 
into synced redoubt

226
00:12:17,833 --> 00:12:20,666
and sinks into that 
old silencing rite.

227
00:12:20,666 --> 00:12:22,100
Shh, some... 
We are...

228
00:12:22,100 --> 00:12:24,233
Shh, what? Shh.

229
00:12:24,233 --> 00:12:25,566
I am, shh... 
(indistinct)

230
00:12:25,566 --> 00:12:27,300
I wanted to have the 
same sort of effect

231
00:12:27,300 --> 00:12:29,400
that I feel when I'm 
listening to a rap song

232
00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:31,933
that samples a vocal 
line underneath the rap

233
00:12:31,933 --> 00:12:33,433
that's being said,

234
00:12:33,433 --> 00:12:35,733
or like people talking me over 
each other at a barbershop.

235
00:12:35,733 --> 00:12:38,333
Black lives matter.

236
00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:42,433
So I wanted simultaneity.

237
00:12:42,433 --> 00:12:44,733
And so that led me 
to doing this work

238
00:12:44,733 --> 00:12:46,600
that I've been calling 
performative typography.

239
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:48,333
Bow wow, shh, shh.

240
00:12:48,333 --> 00:12:50,966
I can't. Shh, shh.

241
00:12:52,566 --> 00:12:56,333
Hashtag Black Lives 
Stutter. Shh, shh, shh.

242
00:12:56,333 --> 00:12:58,700
What we want is to not 
be your what's unwanted,

243
00:12:58,700 --> 00:13:00,566
your whats or your un...

244
00:13:00,566 --> 00:13:02,900
We want what's 
what to be unyours.

245
00:13:02,900 --> 00:13:07,100
We want you to won't what your 
want to want. Shh, shh, shh.

246
00:13:07,100 --> 00:13:09,933
I can't. Shh, shh.

247
00:13:09,933 --> 00:13:12,266
Bow wow says the dog. Shh, shh.

248
00:13:12,266 --> 00:13:15,700
Day and night policeman 
work. Shh, shh.

249
00:13:15,700 --> 00:13:18,500
Fireman points the 
water. Shh, shh.

250
00:13:18,500 --> 00:13:20,233
Bow wow, says the... 
Bow wow, says the...

251
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:25,300
Bow wow... 
Why won't you shh?

252
00:13:30,166 --> 00:13:32,666
(calm music)

253
00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:37,000
It was the summer 
of 2021, I think,

254
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:40,433
that I received my 
diagnosis, you know,

255
00:13:40,433 --> 00:13:43,266
I got my papers for ADHD.

256
00:13:43,266 --> 00:13:46,066
At that point, I 
began to think about

257
00:13:46,066 --> 00:13:48,233
how so often in my work

258
00:13:48,233 --> 00:13:51,266
I was trying to break 
a sort of linearity.

259
00:13:51,266 --> 00:13:54,766
I was trying to work in a 
way that I would describe

260
00:13:54,766 --> 00:13:58,066
as almost kind of fractal, 
where if you tell somebody,

261
00:13:58,066 --> 00:14:00,200
you can read this poem 
any way you want to,

262
00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,000
but you're still 
basically saying,

263
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,733
start at the left top corner

264
00:14:03,733 --> 00:14:05,633
and end of the 
bottom right corner,

265
00:14:05,633 --> 00:14:10,133
you're actually still having 
a normative reading, right?

266
00:14:10,133 --> 00:14:11,233
You've just sort 
of jazzed it up.

267
00:14:11,233 --> 00:14:12,833
And I wanted to create something

268
00:14:12,833 --> 00:14:16,200
that felt really like 
what I was believing

269
00:14:16,200 --> 00:14:19,866
and wanting readers to be 
able to experience in my work.

270
00:14:19,866 --> 00:14:24,066
That the stuff on the page 
looked and sounded closer

271
00:14:24,066 --> 00:14:26,800
to like how I think about it.

272
00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:29,800
Like layers, 
there's just layers.

273
00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:34,866
I mean, I was very interested 
in the way that text looks,

274
00:14:35,666 --> 00:14:37,400
the different sort of artifacts,

275
00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:39,066
different sort of 
rough edges there.

276
00:14:39,066 --> 00:14:42,000
And that's when I began 
using collage techniques.

277
00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:43,766
So writing these collage poems

278
00:14:43,766 --> 00:14:48,833
that allowed me to just 
literally take pieces of text,

279
00:14:49,966 --> 00:14:51,166
of images, things 
that I remembered,

280
00:14:51,166 --> 00:14:53,333
things from comic 
books, movie posters,

281
00:14:53,333 --> 00:14:54,766
and then overlap them

282
00:14:54,766 --> 00:14:58,166
in a way that reminds me 
of like a bathroom wall

283
00:14:58,166 --> 00:15:00,466
with graffiti on it, 
or a graffitied train

284
00:15:00,466 --> 00:15:03,466
or dense advertising spaces.

285
00:15:03,466 --> 00:15:05,133
That kind of simultaneity

286
00:15:06,366 --> 00:15:09,133
also feels more like 
how I take in the world.

287
00:15:09,966 --> 00:15:11,833
So making these poems this way

288
00:15:11,833 --> 00:15:16,400
is a way of saying 
this is still a poem.

289
00:15:17,366 --> 00:15:19,266
It doesn't and may not look like

290
00:15:19,266 --> 00:15:23,200
or be structured like 
someone else's poem,

291
00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:29,433
but if certain kinds of poems 
are reflecting a mind at work,

292
00:15:30,900 --> 00:15:35,966
that's my mind at work, these 
poems are my mind at work.

293
00:15:36,500 --> 00:15:38,600
(calm music)

294
00:15:47,466 --> 00:15:49,500
- I'm looking out of 
the second floor window

295
00:15:49,500 --> 00:15:52,100
of the Minneapolis 
Institute of Art

296
00:15:52,100 --> 00:15:56,233
and I can see my childhood 
church across the park.

297
00:15:56,233 --> 00:15:57,733
Over the years,

298
00:15:57,733 --> 00:16:01,366
both of these buildings have 
been a place of salvation.

299
00:16:01,366 --> 00:16:04,533
When I was a kid, the 
church provided solace,

300
00:16:04,533 --> 00:16:07,566
a light to follow 
and other times

301
00:16:07,566 --> 00:16:09,666
by placing me 
within the mystery.

302
00:16:12,900 --> 00:16:15,900
And there are days now when 
work or life get to be too much

303
00:16:15,900 --> 00:16:18,433
and that's when I 
go to the museum

304
00:16:18,433 --> 00:16:20,866
and it gives me a 
new perspective.

305
00:16:20,866 --> 00:16:23,000
There always seems 
to be a piece of art

306
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:24,700
waiting there to help.

307
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:28,833
Today it starts with a 
white marble sculpture,

308
00:16:28,833 --> 00:16:32,200
Kiss of Victory by 
Sir Alfred Gilbert.

309
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:35,566
It's a life-sized warrior 
caught in the heat of battle

310
00:16:35,566 --> 00:16:39,500
and behind him a winged 
angel at once pursuing

311
00:16:39,500 --> 00:16:44,566
and urging him onward, the 
ethereal wings of victory.

312
00:16:45,666 --> 00:16:47,133
So I take my first 
lap around the work.

313
00:16:47,133 --> 00:16:50,300
Now my college professor, 
Paul Grandlin told me,

314
00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:54,833
"A good sculpture is something 
you wanna walk around."

315
00:16:54,833 --> 00:16:57,966
Every perspective 
brings a new story,

316
00:16:57,966 --> 00:16:59,866
and it's remarkable

317
00:16:59,866 --> 00:17:01,566
how the marble seems to transfer 
the look and feel of skin

318
00:17:01,566 --> 00:17:03,266
the look and feel of skin

319
00:17:03,266 --> 00:17:05,200
but not real skin.

320
00:17:05,200 --> 00:17:07,733
It's beyond real, ideal real.

321
00:17:07,733 --> 00:17:11,433
And the angel is how 
victory is supposed to feel.

322
00:17:11,433 --> 00:17:15,566
Pure trajectory and momentum, 
no sense of loss yet.

323
00:17:15,566 --> 00:17:18,033
(calm music)

324
00:17:19,433 --> 00:17:23,066
The adjacent room features 
a Diane Arbus photograph

325
00:17:23,066 --> 00:17:25,966
of two nudists relaxing at home.

326
00:17:25,966 --> 00:17:29,333
The couple in the photograph 
stare directly at us

327
00:17:29,333 --> 00:17:32,166
and have, well, very different b

328
00:17:32,166 --> 00:17:33,900
than the ones in Winged Victory.

329
00:17:34,966 --> 00:17:38,600
They aren't perfect, and oh 
and they're wearing shoes.

330
00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:41,666
Now, since this is a 
photograph and two-dimensional,

331
00:17:41,666 --> 00:17:44,700
Arbus has chosen our 
perspective for us.

332
00:17:44,700 --> 00:17:48,400
The starkness heightened by 
the black and white print.

333
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:51,666
Her work tends to confront 
and challenge,

334
00:17:51,666 --> 00:17:55,600
but these folks in the 
photo, they're at home,

335
00:17:55,600 --> 00:17:59,100
they're in the world, they 
look content and unashamed.

336
00:17:59,100 --> 00:18:01,866
Their front door is 
open, like, come on in.

337
00:18:01,866 --> 00:18:04,900
With Arbus' work, if 
there is discomfort,

338
00:18:04,900 --> 00:18:07,366
it seems to come not 
from the subjects

339
00:18:07,366 --> 00:18:10,300
but from what we 
bring to the work.

340
00:18:10,300 --> 00:18:12,633
Now as I look at the photograph,

341
00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:14,533
somebody steps in front of me.

342
00:18:14,533 --> 00:18:17,733
This is my favorite part 
of being in a museum,

343
00:18:17,733 --> 00:18:19,100
other people.

344
00:18:19,100 --> 00:18:20,800
I mean, real flesh and blood.

345
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:23,800
They unknowingly become exhibits

346
00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:26,733
The woman stands between 
me and the photograph,

347
00:18:26,733 --> 00:18:30,033
and although she's in more 
ways closer in appearance

348
00:18:30,033 --> 00:18:33,066
to the Arbus than 
the Winged Victory,

349
00:18:33,066 --> 00:18:37,133
I'm reminded of how beautiful 
humans actually are.

350
00:18:37,133 --> 00:18:41,466
There's something that 
we really can't capture.

351
00:18:41,466 --> 00:18:44,600
So behind me is the 
perfection of Winged Victory,

352
00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:47,566
before me stands the 
woman, and beyond her,

353
00:18:47,566 --> 00:18:51,266
the Arbus nudes stare out 
of their normal day at home.

354
00:18:51,266 --> 00:18:54,233
Oh, and through the 
window across the street,

355
00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:56,800
that's God's house.

356
00:18:56,800 --> 00:18:59,266
(calm music)

357
00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:06,133
- Changing perspectives

358
00:19:06,133 --> 00:19:09,300
allows us to briefly 
inhabit new spaces.

359
00:19:09,300 --> 00:19:11,833
- Changing perspectives 
is an invitation

360
00:19:11,833 --> 00:19:13,700
to find our commonalities

361
00:19:13,700 --> 00:19:17,766
and to shift some 
of the conscious and 
unconscious beliefs.

362
00:19:17,766 --> 00:19:21,066
- In medical spaces, 
changing perspectives

363
00:19:21,066 --> 00:19:22,566
has led to a movement

364
00:19:22,566 --> 00:19:26,266
away from fixing the people 
we care for, and instead,

365
00:19:26,266 --> 00:19:29,800
focusing on hearing what 
patients tell us they need.

366
00:19:29,800 --> 00:19:33,166
By involving patients as 
co-experts in their care

367
00:19:33,166 --> 00:19:36,000
and considering how we 
use our medical expertise

368
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:39,500
to aid them in achieving 
their desired goals.

369
00:19:39,500 --> 00:19:42,966
This shift has also led 
to a closer examination

370
00:19:42,966 --> 00:19:45,466
of how we view ourselves 
as a profession.

371
00:19:45,466 --> 00:19:47,966
(calm music)

372
00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:53,566
- I think there are a number 
of misconceptions in medicine

373
00:19:53,566 --> 00:19:55,233
about people with disabilities.

374
00:19:55,233 --> 00:19:56,833
One way we can combat that

375
00:19:56,833 --> 00:19:59,133
is through increasing 
representation of 
disabled trainees.

376
00:19:59,133 --> 00:20:01,033
of disabled trainees.

377
00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:03,166
- I wish the medical community

378
00:20:03,166 --> 00:20:07,400
understood that there's far 
more of their colleagues

379
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:08,933
that have disabilities.

380
00:20:08,933 --> 00:20:12,266
- And also to compliment 
that with education

381
00:20:12,266 --> 00:20:15,466
specifically about disability 
and disability culture

382
00:20:15,466 --> 00:20:17,100
and disability identity.

383
00:20:17,100 --> 00:20:19,366
- With my work as 
a pediatrician, 
having a disability,

384
00:20:19,366 --> 00:20:23,000
it brings the perspective 
of understanding.

385
00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:27,300
And working with children 
with disabilities like ADHD,

386
00:20:27,300 --> 00:20:30,300
allowing those children 
to see their doctor,

387
00:20:30,300 --> 00:20:34,333
who also has ADHD, is able 
to still become a doctor.

388
00:20:34,333 --> 00:20:37,933
And to those parents to 
see with their own eyes

389
00:20:37,933 --> 00:20:39,233
that, you know, my child

390
00:20:39,233 --> 00:20:41,266
can still achieve 
all of their goals

391
00:20:41,266 --> 00:20:44,766
and they're not limited 
by their disability.

392
00:20:44,766 --> 00:20:47,233
(calm music)

393
00:20:49,833 --> 00:20:52,866
- I had pretty much spent 
a lot of time studying

394
00:20:52,866 --> 00:20:55,766
and hadn't really 
spent a lot of time

395
00:20:55,766 --> 00:20:59,266
exploring other 
interests of mine.

396
00:20:59,266 --> 00:21:00,833
Prior to starting med school,

397
00:21:00,833 --> 00:21:02,366
one of my mentors told me

398
00:21:02,366 --> 00:21:04,733
they thought I needed 
a different outlet

399
00:21:04,733 --> 00:21:06,233
besides just medicine.

400
00:21:06,233 --> 00:21:09,800
(upbeat electronic music)

401
00:21:13,133 --> 00:21:18,200
My name's Carmen Aguirre. 
I go by VJ Neurite.

402
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:21,066
I'm creating a show file.

403
00:21:22,166 --> 00:21:24,133
I'm going through 
a list of the songs

404
00:21:24,133 --> 00:21:25,366
that are gonna be played

405
00:21:25,366 --> 00:21:27,433
and coming up with 
what visual look

406
00:21:27,433 --> 00:21:29,400
we're going to have on stage.

407
00:21:29,400 --> 00:21:32,200
I got into doing visuals

408
00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:34,200
the year before I 
started med school.

409
00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:37,833
Found it really fun and started 
doing it as just a hobby,

410
00:21:37,833 --> 00:21:41,633
slowly developed into something 
I kind of had not predicted.

411
00:21:41,633 --> 00:21:42,500
- Let's go.

412
00:21:42,500 --> 00:21:44,966
(upbeat music)

413
00:21:44,966 --> 00:21:47,866
- The uniqueness of 
being a med student,

414
00:21:47,866 --> 00:21:51,466
VJ has really taught 
me the importance

415
00:21:51,466 --> 00:21:53,900
of having balance in life.

416
00:21:53,900 --> 00:21:56,966
Understanding that 
balance is so important

417
00:21:56,966 --> 00:21:59,733
for helping your patients 
find that balance.

418
00:21:59,733 --> 00:22:01,000
(upbeat music)

419
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:02,400
When I first started med school,

420
00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:06,166
was the first time I 
experienced a lot of anxiety

421
00:22:06,166 --> 00:22:07,333
and things like that.

422
00:22:07,333 --> 00:22:09,366
I had never really 
experienced that before,

423
00:22:09,366 --> 00:22:13,033
like severe anxiety, and 
VJing gave me an outlet

424
00:22:13,033 --> 00:22:15,133
to treat that anxiety.

425
00:22:15,133 --> 00:22:16,666
And so I think

426
00:22:16,666 --> 00:22:18,800
one does not exist 
without the other, for me.

427
00:22:21,500 --> 00:22:25,100
This is a creative monster. 
This is a sleepy monster.

428
00:22:25,100 --> 00:22:29,066
For me, I really define or 
think, in terms of disability,

429
00:22:29,066 --> 00:22:30,733
I think a lot about 
mental health.

430
00:22:30,733 --> 00:22:33,633
This is a happy monster.

431
00:22:33,633 --> 00:22:34,866
(chuckles)

432
00:22:34,866 --> 00:22:37,600
In COVID, I got into 
the NFT community

433
00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:40,866
and was making digital art

434
00:22:40,866 --> 00:22:43,166
and I came up with a concept

435
00:22:43,166 --> 00:22:48,233
for really wanting to address 
mental health in children.

436
00:22:48,866 --> 00:22:50,333
A sad monster.

437
00:22:50,333 --> 00:22:54,466
When COVID hit, we saw 
a five times increase

438
00:22:54,466 --> 00:22:55,966
in the amount of kids

439
00:22:55,966 --> 00:22:57,800
that were coming into 
the emergency room

440
00:22:57,800 --> 00:23:00,000
with mental health complaints.

441
00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:02,466
Sometimes it's 
hard to communicate

442
00:23:02,466 --> 00:23:04,633
the types of emotions 
you're having,

443
00:23:04,633 --> 00:23:07,866
so my idea was coming up 
with these little monsters

444
00:23:07,866 --> 00:23:10,133
that each represented 
a different emotion.

445
00:23:10,133 --> 00:23:11,233
The goal around the project

446
00:23:11,233 --> 00:23:12,966
was really to bring attention

447
00:23:12,966 --> 00:23:16,433
to talking about 
emotions and feelings.

448
00:23:16,433 --> 00:23:19,633
What I found was it was 
not just a valuable tool

449
00:23:19,633 --> 00:23:21,100
with kids and mental health,

450
00:23:21,100 --> 00:23:25,133
but also people that had 
difficulties communicating.

451
00:23:25,133 --> 00:23:28,133
So this could be people 
with language barriers,

452
00:23:28,133 --> 00:23:32,866
people with, who may be 
neurodiverse.

453
00:23:32,866 --> 00:23:35,200
Confused monster, 
I like this one.

454
00:23:36,466 --> 00:23:39,400
I did a rotation at a hospital,

455
00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:41,366
and this is something 
I don't like to admit,

456
00:23:41,366 --> 00:23:42,966
but like the staff was arguing

457
00:23:42,966 --> 00:23:44,766
about who was going to 
have to take the patient

458
00:23:44,766 --> 00:23:46,433
with a mental health disorder.

459
00:23:46,433 --> 00:23:49,833
It didn't come from 
a place of hatred,

460
00:23:49,833 --> 00:23:53,100
it just came from a place 
of not understanding.

461
00:23:53,100 --> 00:23:56,433
I created a whole like 
emotional support pet,

462
00:23:56,433 --> 00:23:59,233
so all of the 
monsters have pets.

463
00:23:59,233 --> 00:24:01,700
My own experiences 
with mental health

464
00:24:01,700 --> 00:24:05,500
as well as like my 
experiences in rotations,

465
00:24:05,500 --> 00:24:09,300
really changed my course 
in what I wanted to study.

466
00:24:09,300 --> 00:24:12,733
Because initially I was 
planning to do neurosurgery

467
00:24:12,733 --> 00:24:15,666
and neurology, and it guided me

468
00:24:15,666 --> 00:24:19,000
into wanting to do mental 
health and psychiatry.

469
00:24:20,366 --> 00:24:25,266
Medicine, it's very set up 
to cater towards an average

470
00:24:26,466 --> 00:24:30,333
rather than an 
individualized care plan.

471
00:24:30,333 --> 00:24:35,166
I don't think it's always 
very successful as a result,

472
00:24:35,166 --> 00:24:39,500
because we're all so 
unique and diverse.

473
00:24:39,500 --> 00:24:44,300
And I think it also alienates 
the most diverse people

474
00:24:44,300 --> 00:24:47,200
from getting the type 
of care that they need.

475
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:49,733
This is a shy monster.

476
00:24:49,733 --> 00:24:52,133
If we can break 
down the barriers

477
00:24:52,133 --> 00:24:55,333
of seeing things 
in a certain box,

478
00:24:55,333 --> 00:24:57,766
then we can kind of progress

479
00:24:57,766 --> 00:25:00,733
towards a better 
future in medicine.

480
00:25:00,733 --> 00:25:03,200
(calm music)

481
00:25:11,966 --> 00:25:13,166
- I'm Michael Kim.

482
00:25:13,166 --> 00:25:15,666
I am the assistant dean 
for student affairs

483
00:25:15,666 --> 00:25:18,266
at the medical school, 
and I'm a physician.

484
00:25:18,266 --> 00:25:20,800
And I practice internal 
medicine, pediatrics.

485
00:25:22,700 --> 00:25:24,366
So I have history of depression.

486
00:25:24,366 --> 00:25:26,233
The demands of medical school

487
00:25:26,233 --> 00:25:29,100
really made my 
depression flare up.

488
00:25:29,100 --> 00:25:30,366
Happy to say

489
00:25:30,366 --> 00:25:32,400
that I was able to go to 
the mental health clinic

490
00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:36,033
here at the University of 
Minnesota and get counseling

491
00:25:36,033 --> 00:25:39,800
and medical treatment, which 
really helped me be successful.

492
00:25:41,166 --> 00:25:44,033
Having experienced challenges

493
00:25:44,033 --> 00:25:46,366
with depression as 
a medical student

494
00:25:46,366 --> 00:25:48,900
has really helped me 
provide a better support

495
00:25:48,900 --> 00:25:50,033
for students here.

496
00:25:50,033 --> 00:25:51,733
And so when I'm 
meeting with a student,

497
00:25:51,733 --> 00:25:53,466
I can really show that empathy

498
00:25:53,466 --> 00:25:55,900
of someone who's been 
through a similar course.

499
00:25:57,200 --> 00:25:59,433
What's important to 
think about in disability

500
00:25:59,433 --> 00:26:01,766
is that psychological 
disabilities,

501
00:26:01,766 --> 00:26:04,733
like depression, anxiety, 
are really disabilities,

502
00:26:04,733 --> 00:26:07,666
that they should be 
accommodated and considered

503
00:26:07,666 --> 00:26:10,133
similarly to other disabilities.

504
00:26:10,133 --> 00:26:12,900
Approximately 10% 
of our students

505
00:26:12,900 --> 00:26:15,466
have accommodations 
during medical school.

506
00:26:15,466 --> 00:26:17,566
That is the highest 
number of students

507
00:26:17,566 --> 00:26:21,033
of any medical school in the 
country that I am aware of.

508
00:26:21,033 --> 00:26:25,566
There are many reasons why 
we really want to encourage,

509
00:26:25,566 --> 00:26:27,166
promote, support,

510
00:26:27,166 --> 00:26:31,100
and get people with 
disabilities as physicians.

511
00:26:31,100 --> 00:26:34,266
Primarily, because 
we know from studies

512
00:26:34,266 --> 00:26:36,100
that physicians 
with disabilities

513
00:26:36,100 --> 00:26:38,866
provide better care for 
patients with disabilities.

514
00:26:38,866 --> 00:26:42,066
But not only that, there's 
evidence to suggest

515
00:26:42,066 --> 00:26:43,833
that if you're a physician

516
00:26:43,833 --> 00:26:46,500
and you have a colleague you 
work with who has a disability,

517
00:26:46,500 --> 00:26:49,566
you also provide better care 
to patients with disability.

518
00:26:49,566 --> 00:26:51,633
And then, finally, 
we learn so much more

519
00:26:51,633 --> 00:26:54,633
when we have a 
diverse workforce.

520
00:26:54,633 --> 00:26:58,866
I think about all the patients 
who come into a clinic

521
00:26:58,866 --> 00:27:01,600
and potentially see a physician

522
00:27:01,600 --> 00:27:06,066
who has a mobility disability 
or has a sensory disability.

523
00:27:06,066 --> 00:27:09,566
These are amazing things for 
our patients to be able to see.

524
00:27:09,566 --> 00:27:12,200
And to have that trust 
in our profession,

525
00:27:12,200 --> 00:27:15,566
that is so important 
in providing the 
best possible care.

526
00:27:15,566 --> 00:27:18,033
(calm music)

527
00:27:19,366 --> 00:27:22,366
- Everyone's experiences 
in life are unique

528
00:27:22,366 --> 00:27:26,733
and shaped by everything from 
race, gender, and citizenship

529
00:27:26,733 --> 00:27:29,466
to family roles, 
religious beliefs,

530
00:27:29,466 --> 00:27:32,466
and where in the nation 
or world you live.

531
00:27:32,466 --> 00:27:33,900
- Even within our communities,

532
00:27:33,900 --> 00:27:36,566
we may have experiences 
and knowledge

533
00:27:36,566 --> 00:27:38,100
that differ from others.

534
00:27:38,100 --> 00:27:40,866
This is also true 
of disabled people.

535
00:27:40,866 --> 00:27:42,633
- The Americans 
with Disability Act

536
00:27:42,633 --> 00:27:44,300
and the World 
Health Organization

537
00:27:44,300 --> 00:27:46,100
acknowledges many, many

538
00:27:46,100 --> 00:27:48,333
different disability experiences

539
00:27:48,333 --> 00:27:52,600
mental, physical, emotional, 
congenital or acquired.

540
00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:55,966
Disability as we know it is 
a mixture of these identities

541
00:27:55,966 --> 00:27:58,800
and shape our daily 
lives in distinct ways.

542
00:27:58,800 --> 00:28:02,033
(calm music)

543
00:28:02,033 --> 00:28:04,100
- There's a spectrum 
of the many ways

544
00:28:04,100 --> 00:28:09,166
in which us folks with 
disabilities are in this world,

545
00:28:09,966 --> 00:28:11,400
in existence in this world.

546
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:13,866
- I'm at the age where 
I'm not really sure

547
00:28:13,866 --> 00:28:16,266
what is the disability 
and what is aging.

548
00:28:16,266 --> 00:28:18,066
You wear stuff out.

549
00:28:18,066 --> 00:28:20,466
Try to wear a pair of 
shoes for 72 years.

550
00:28:20,466 --> 00:28:22,600
- The disability is complicated.

551
00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:26,466
The experience of a 
person with one disability

552
00:28:26,466 --> 00:28:29,466
is gonna be quite different 
from a different person

553
00:28:29,466 --> 00:28:30,900
with the same disability.

554
00:28:30,900 --> 00:28:34,600
- My autism, my ADHD, my OCD

555
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:36,533
helps me collaborate ideas

556
00:28:36,533 --> 00:28:38,866
about vast numbers 
of the cosmos,

557
00:28:38,866 --> 00:28:41,366
the neurotypical people 
just don't understand.

558
00:28:41,366 --> 00:28:42,966
- These are labels and stuff,

559
00:28:42,966 --> 00:28:47,766
but ultimately it's 
part of who I am.

560
00:28:47,766 --> 00:28:50,000
It's written in the stars 
for me to be who I am.

561
00:28:50,000 --> 00:28:53,166
- It's a component of 
me. It's not all of me.

562
00:28:54,700 --> 00:28:57,200
(calm music)

563
00:29:06,966 --> 00:29:09,633
- Heaven is all goodbyes, 
but I hope it's soft.

564
00:29:11,233 --> 00:29:13,933
Softness of skin, 
softness of thought.

565
00:29:13,933 --> 00:29:16,400
Call me soft and I'll 
send you a heart.

566
00:29:16,400 --> 00:29:19,133
Won't do fisticuffs, 
just brisket cuts.

567
00:29:19,133 --> 00:29:22,333
When people called me soft, 
I found I'd be ashamed.

568
00:29:22,333 --> 00:29:25,600
Now I call myself soft, 
to rebuke that disdain.

569
00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:28,533
Autistic, sensitive 
to everything.

570
00:29:28,533 --> 00:29:31,266
Autistic, we don't 
speak the same.

571
00:29:31,266 --> 00:29:34,266
Autistic, in every poem I sing.

572
00:29:34,266 --> 00:29:36,666
Autistic, in every song I cry.

573
00:29:36,666 --> 00:29:40,100
Using tears to wipe ink 
smudge from my pants cuffs.

574
00:29:40,100 --> 00:29:42,066
Drowning in words, 
living for life.

575
00:29:42,066 --> 00:29:45,233
Heard it once told that life 
is wasted on the living.

576
00:29:45,233 --> 00:29:47,633
And death isn't something 
we should dwell on.

577
00:29:47,633 --> 00:29:49,066
All I know for certain is

578
00:29:49,066 --> 00:29:52,266
life exists on the fence 
between hope and hopelessness.

579
00:29:52,266 --> 00:29:54,766
It's like a seesaw, 
being Autistic,

580
00:29:54,766 --> 00:29:57,733
swinging from joy to a meltdown.

581
00:29:57,733 --> 00:30:01,400
Sensory overwhelm, need 
something soft to calm me down.

582
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:03,300
The good Lord blessed 
me with soft skin.

583
00:30:03,300 --> 00:30:05,200
So, I caress myself 
for comforting.

584
00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:08,533
My masseuse, 20 years 
in the game, once said,

585
00:30:08,533 --> 00:30:10,033
I had the softest skin.

586
00:30:10,033 --> 00:30:11,933
The softest skin 
she'd ever felt.

587
00:30:11,933 --> 00:30:14,533
Like velvet, like felt.

588
00:30:15,733 --> 00:30:17,166
I took the compliment.

589
00:30:17,166 --> 00:30:20,333
But deep down, I knew 
Autism was to thank.

590
00:30:20,333 --> 00:30:22,233
Autism and Allah.

591
00:30:22,233 --> 00:30:25,700
One of the primary features of 
EDS, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome,

592
00:30:25,700 --> 00:30:27,166
is velvet soft skin.

593
00:30:27,166 --> 00:30:30,433
EDS is associated with ASD.

594
00:30:30,433 --> 00:30:33,800
I hate how white people 
attach syndrome or disorder

595
00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:35,333
to everything they 
don't understand,

596
00:30:35,333 --> 00:30:37,466
and I hate how 
negative connotations

597
00:30:37,466 --> 00:30:39,466
are attached to 
those attachments.

598
00:30:39,466 --> 00:30:42,366
Which perhaps explains 
the negative connotations

599
00:30:42,366 --> 00:30:46,866
I attach to my-same- 
self-said-Said-Saciid-name.

600
00:30:46,866 --> 00:30:49,066
What's a shorter 
word for connotation?

601
00:30:49,066 --> 00:30:52,066
How about, bro pass me the 
cream cheese and a light.

602
00:30:52,066 --> 00:30:54,200
Pass me the hookah and a sprite.

603
00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:57,433
Pass me fatty food and bring 
to stummy great delight.

604
00:30:57,433 --> 00:31:00,466
Better yet, pass me a 
prescription for my ADHD.

605
00:31:00,466 --> 00:31:02,000
So I don't have to self-medicate 
just to get through life.

606
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:03,933
just to get through life.

607
00:31:03,933 --> 00:31:06,866
And if you can spare it, 
pass me that peace of mind.

608
00:31:11,033 --> 00:31:14,366
Right behind two lost 
lovers stuck between time.

609
00:31:14,366 --> 00:31:16,966
And the metronome which 
hangs over us all.

610
00:31:16,966 --> 00:31:20,266
Ticking, tocking, 
clicking, clocking.

611
00:31:20,266 --> 00:31:23,300
Bombs over Baghdad, 
bombs over Baidabo.

612
00:31:23,300 --> 00:31:26,633
Bombs over Kyiv, bombs 
over Kurdish Peshmerga.

613
00:31:26,633 --> 00:31:28,633
Young (beep), ever a learner.

614
00:31:28,633 --> 00:31:30,066
Never have I clutched a burner.

615
00:31:30,066 --> 00:31:32,533
That's a lie, but I 
was born in the land

616
00:31:32,533 --> 00:31:34,566
where AKs are cheaper 
than grains of sand.

617
00:31:34,566 --> 00:31:36,500
And sand is all we understand.

618
00:31:36,500 --> 00:31:38,366
The sun is all we have.

619
00:31:38,366 --> 00:31:41,233
The Blackness of our skin, 
protecting us from it.

620
00:31:41,233 --> 00:31:43,966
White people colonized 
Africa but 400 years

621
00:31:43,966 --> 00:31:46,300
after the Dutch erected 
limp castles on our land,

622
00:31:46,300 --> 00:31:49,666
their descendants' skin 
still peels off in the sun.

623
00:31:49,666 --> 00:31:51,733
They can't even 
protect skin from sun,

624
00:31:51,733 --> 00:31:53,500
yet we're the inferior ones?

625
00:31:55,266 --> 00:31:56,066
Anyway.

626
00:31:57,000 --> 00:31:59,100
None of that matters anyway.

627
00:31:59,100 --> 00:32:01,666
I just pray I get to 
see heaven one day.

628
00:32:01,666 --> 00:32:04,200
Wish heaven on earth 
for all my people.

629
00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:06,366
Wish heaven was 
easier to get into.

630
00:32:06,366 --> 00:32:09,066
But as the prophet PBUH 
be up on him once said,

631
00:32:09,066 --> 00:32:10,933
the road to heaven is 
paved with hardship,

632
00:32:10,933 --> 00:32:12,966
the road to hell 
paved with ease.

633
00:32:12,966 --> 00:32:14,700
So if this life 
is any testament,

634
00:32:14,700 --> 00:32:16,800
heaven just may 
be in our future.

635
00:32:16,800 --> 00:32:17,766
At least we hope.

636
00:32:18,866 --> 00:32:20,100
And hope is all I 
have these days,

637
00:32:20,100 --> 00:32:23,233
when nights turn to day, 
turn to nights again.

638
00:32:23,233 --> 00:32:26,333
When the blood moon 
serenades my waking dreams.

639
00:32:26,333 --> 00:32:29,500
When Larry Levis' ghost 
writes living poems in Fresno,

640
00:32:29,500 --> 00:32:31,533
Modesto, San Diego.

641
00:32:31,533 --> 00:32:34,100
Takes the form of dirt 
devils, sand tornados,

642
00:32:34,100 --> 00:32:36,266
uses wind to carve 
poems about nothing

643
00:32:36,266 --> 00:32:38,466
into still more nothing.

644
00:32:38,466 --> 00:32:41,166
Migrant farmers step 
over stillborn poems

645
00:32:41,166 --> 00:32:43,433
as they pluck fruit 
destined to be tossed

646
00:32:43,433 --> 00:32:45,000
from suburban fridges.

647
00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:46,166
I got cousins back home

648
00:32:46,166 --> 00:32:48,433
who've never seen 
strawberries or fridges.

649
00:32:48,433 --> 00:32:49,966
I don't know what that means,

650
00:32:49,966 --> 00:32:52,266
but I should probably 
cherish something.

651
00:32:52,266 --> 00:32:54,166
At least while I still can.

652
00:32:54,166 --> 00:32:56,100
Lord knows they could 
be on their way.

653
00:32:56,100 --> 00:32:59,433
Shoot, I think they knocking 
on my door right now.

654
00:32:59,433 --> 00:33:00,900
No knock raid.

655
00:33:00,900 --> 00:33:02,633
Ain't that how the 
last brother got tased?

656
00:33:02,633 --> 00:33:03,800
I mean shot.

657
00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:07,266
Shoot, I mistook 
their guns for tasers.

658
00:33:07,266 --> 00:33:08,466
Ain't that what they said

659
00:33:08,466 --> 00:33:09,666
about the brother they 
killed before him?

660
00:33:09,666 --> 00:33:13,066
He was shot, a nine 
millimeter Glock taser?

661
00:33:13,066 --> 00:33:14,900
This is Minnesota, bro.

662
00:33:14,900 --> 00:33:17,833
All we export is frigid 
ice and police lies.

663
00:33:17,833 --> 00:33:19,000
Murder too, tho.

664
00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:21,400
We export a lot of murder here.

665
00:33:21,400 --> 00:33:25,633
Shoot, am I next?

666
00:33:27,300 --> 00:33:29,566
I wonder what lie they'll 
export about my murder,

667
00:33:29,566 --> 00:33:30,533
about my death.

668
00:33:31,666 --> 00:33:33,466
I pray I'm not next.

669
00:33:33,466 --> 00:33:36,366
And every one of my brothers 
prays he's not next.

670
00:33:36,366 --> 00:33:39,233
In a country that values 
our bodies only in death.

671
00:33:39,233 --> 00:33:42,533
Where we know every traffic 
stop could be our death.

672
00:33:42,533 --> 00:33:44,533
In the land of never 
quite making rent.

673
00:33:45,933 --> 00:33:48,533
Hmm, this place is hell.

674
00:33:49,600 --> 00:33:51,300
But is that such a bad thing?

675
00:33:52,533 --> 00:33:55,800
Hell is hard and 
hardship leads to heaven.

676
00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:59,100
And heaven is all we 
have to keep us going.

677
00:33:59,100 --> 00:34:02,266
Heaven is all goodbyes, 
but I hope it's soft.

678
00:34:02,266 --> 00:34:04,366
I hope heaven is 
softer than this life.

679
00:34:05,466 --> 00:34:07,500
And I hope I see you 
on the other side.

680
00:34:07,500 --> 00:34:10,333
(cheerful music)

681
00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:16,466
(calm music)

682
00:34:35,900 --> 00:34:37,233
- [Interpreter] I 
remember when I was little

683
00:34:37,233 --> 00:34:39,800
and the Sunday newspaper 
had that comics insert

684
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:41,766
and they were called 
the funnies back then.

685
00:34:41,766 --> 00:34:44,500
I always looked forward to the 
newspaper arriving on Sunday.

686
00:34:44,500 --> 00:34:46,000
And when it would come

687
00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:48,300
I would open up that big 
section of the newspaper.

688
00:34:48,300 --> 00:34:49,933
And even as a small child,

689
00:34:49,933 --> 00:34:52,266
I would lay on the 
floor and take it all in

690
00:34:52,266 --> 00:34:54,666
fascinated with the 
colors and the storylines

691
00:34:54,666 --> 00:34:55,866
that the strips showed.

692
00:34:58,266 --> 00:35:02,233
Growing up I would observe how 
people interacted around me.

693
00:35:02,233 --> 00:35:03,600
After becoming a parent,

694
00:35:03,600 --> 00:35:06,800
I saw those interactions 
play out in my own life

695
00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:09,100
and some funny 
situations would occur.

696
00:35:10,433 --> 00:35:12,766
I wanted to take that 
humor and put it on paper

697
00:35:12,766 --> 00:35:15,066
as part of showing 
what my life is like

698
00:35:15,066 --> 00:35:16,466
as a Deaf individual.

699
00:35:18,033 --> 00:35:20,266
When I think of art 
and how I use art,

700
00:35:20,266 --> 00:35:22,433
it's powerful and visual.

701
00:35:23,533 --> 00:35:26,466
The stimuli comes in 
and we experience it.

702
00:35:26,466 --> 00:35:29,666
Of all the information we 
get through our eyes visually

703
00:35:29,666 --> 00:35:32,233
it comes across in 
vibrations in our body.

704
00:35:32,233 --> 00:35:33,900
So how I think about the world

705
00:35:33,900 --> 00:35:36,533
and how I view art 
is so much different.

706
00:35:38,733 --> 00:35:41,700
I think the key theme 
for me is communication.

707
00:35:43,033 --> 00:35:44,966
I struggled to communicate 
when I was growing up.

708
00:35:44,966 --> 00:35:47,833
It became then a reoccurring 
theme in my life and in my work

709
00:35:47,833 --> 00:35:50,533
because of my desire to 
want to connect with others.

710
00:35:51,966 --> 00:35:53,833
I want to communicate visually.

711
00:35:55,133 --> 00:35:58,400
I feel the direct impact 
that visuals have on my life.

712
00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:01,700
My work is intended to 
reflect this impact to others

713
00:36:01,700 --> 00:36:04,700
so that they can experience 
it for themselves as well.

714
00:36:04,700 --> 00:36:06,633
When I started out 
drawing comics,

715
00:36:06,633 --> 00:36:09,033
the dialogue bubbles 
or word balloons

716
00:36:09,033 --> 00:36:12,533
would be filled with English 
text and this felt jarring.

717
00:36:12,533 --> 00:36:15,366
I don't walk around in my 
daily life speaking English.

718
00:36:15,366 --> 00:36:17,266
I speak American Sign Language.

719
00:36:17,266 --> 00:36:19,566
I tried drawing ASL 
inside the panels,

720
00:36:19,566 --> 00:36:22,266
but the frozen words 
took up too much space

721
00:36:22,266 --> 00:36:23,633
and it wasn't enough.

722
00:36:23,633 --> 00:36:26,466
I wanted the same conversational 
ease that English has

723
00:36:26,466 --> 00:36:27,866
within those word balloons.

724
00:36:27,866 --> 00:36:29,400
After some time researching,

725
00:36:29,400 --> 00:36:32,433
I came across a potential 
method of written ASL

726
00:36:32,433 --> 00:36:34,100
that fit what I was looking for.

727
00:36:34,100 --> 00:36:36,133
I spent some time 
learning that method.

728
00:36:36,133 --> 00:36:37,866
It wasn't fully developed then.

729
00:36:37,866 --> 00:36:40,000
So I worked with the 
written ASL community

730
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:41,700
to develop a stable version

731
00:36:41,700 --> 00:36:43,033
that would be on equal footing

732
00:36:43,033 --> 00:36:44,533
with the English in my comment.

733
00:36:44,533 --> 00:36:47,133
I feel so much better now 
being able to write in ASL.

734
00:36:48,433 --> 00:36:50,333
It doesn't matter what 
language you're thinking of,

735
00:36:50,333 --> 00:36:52,933
there's always 
different nuances.

736
00:36:52,933 --> 00:36:56,433
As an English user, you have 
your own traditions, thoughts,

737
00:36:56,433 --> 00:36:59,266
worldviews based off the 
language that you use.

738
00:36:59,266 --> 00:37:00,733
It's the same idea for a person

739
00:37:00,733 --> 00:37:02,533
that uses American 
Sign Language.

740
00:37:02,533 --> 00:37:06,066
It doesn't have the same 
structure as English whatsoever.

741
00:37:06,066 --> 00:37:08,533
(calm music)

742
00:37:09,666 --> 00:37:12,533
Many people reach 
out to me and ask,

743
00:37:12,533 --> 00:37:14,500
"How do you work with 
a Deaf individual?"

744
00:37:14,500 --> 00:37:18,333
If you're hearing, don't 
impose your expectations on us.

745
00:37:18,333 --> 00:37:20,100
If you're reaching 
out to a Deaf artist,

746
00:37:20,100 --> 00:37:22,033
you need to be seeking 
for equal footing,

747
00:37:22,033 --> 00:37:23,366
seeing us eye to eye,

748
00:37:23,366 --> 00:37:25,300
try to communicate with us

749
00:37:25,300 --> 00:37:27,733
and we can grow a 
relationship from there.

750
00:37:32,066 --> 00:37:35,200
- And these are 
gonna be strikers.

751
00:37:35,200 --> 00:37:37,866
And strikers is where 
you hold matches.

752
00:37:37,866 --> 00:37:40,600
'Cause, you know, I'm about 
ready for the barbecue season.

753
00:37:42,000 --> 00:37:45,500
First of all, I was born Blind.

754
00:37:45,500 --> 00:37:48,433
I don't let my disability 
stop me from being a potter.

755
00:37:48,433 --> 00:37:52,233
And what drew me to it is 
the fact that I like tactile.

756
00:37:52,233 --> 00:37:53,433
Like you're always picking up,

757
00:37:53,433 --> 00:37:56,933
touching everything, 
that's me at the store.

758
00:37:56,933 --> 00:37:59,066
Everything that you see in life

759
00:37:59,066 --> 00:38:00,566
or that you 
experience and touch,

760
00:38:00,566 --> 00:38:03,100
it inspired me to figure 
out what I'm gonna make.

761
00:38:04,766 --> 00:38:06,033
Your mind keeps saying,

762
00:38:06,033 --> 00:38:07,966
well let me see what 
it takes to build it.

763
00:38:07,966 --> 00:38:10,400
These are berry bowls 
and believe it or not,

764
00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:11,766
this is a soup container

765
00:38:11,766 --> 00:38:13,666
that comes off of 
those packaged soups.

766
00:38:13,666 --> 00:38:17,166
And I take my berry bowl 
and I set it up this way.

767
00:38:18,533 --> 00:38:20,766
When I say that I do pottery

768
00:38:20,766 --> 00:38:25,166
or they see me working and 
doing pottery, they're shocked.

769
00:38:25,166 --> 00:38:26,666
Traditionally,

770
00:38:26,666 --> 00:38:28,466
there's not that many women 
and especially women of color

771
00:38:28,466 --> 00:38:29,866
or people with disabilities,

772
00:38:29,866 --> 00:38:33,566
I don't know any Blind 
female Black women in pottery

773
00:38:33,566 --> 00:38:37,233
to tell you the truth, 
I've never met one yet.

774
00:38:37,233 --> 00:38:38,133
(chuckles)

775
00:38:38,133 --> 00:38:40,600
(calm music)

776
00:38:40,600 --> 00:38:42,033
I like texture.

777
00:38:42,033 --> 00:38:45,200
Texture is my way of 
knowing what's around me.

778
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:48,466
So your mind is always 
trying to figure out

779
00:38:48,466 --> 00:38:50,966
exactly how is it 
supposed to be.

780
00:38:50,966 --> 00:38:53,600
And that's part of the 
reason why I got into pottery

781
00:38:53,600 --> 00:38:56,433
was because I wanted 
to always figure it out

782
00:38:56,433 --> 00:39:00,466
and not just live in the world 
of a woman with a disability.

783
00:39:00,466 --> 00:39:02,000
You can live in the world

784
00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:04,266
but you need to exist in 
the world that you live in.

785
00:39:04,266 --> 00:39:05,766
And the only way that can happen

786
00:39:05,766 --> 00:39:07,933
is that you actually get out 
there and you touch things

787
00:39:07,933 --> 00:39:11,466
and you feel things and 
you don't let people say

788
00:39:11,466 --> 00:39:13,533
what your world 
is supposed to be.

789
00:39:13,533 --> 00:39:16,900
And I just start putting 
that coat on there somewhere.

790
00:39:16,900 --> 00:39:20,066
A disability does 
not mean no ability.

791
00:39:20,066 --> 00:39:22,200
Disability is about ability.

792
00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:24,266
Using the abilities 
that you have to create.

793
00:39:24,266 --> 00:39:26,266
And if you really wanna do it,

794
00:39:26,266 --> 00:39:28,333
you'll figure out how to do it.

795
00:39:28,333 --> 00:39:29,566
I want in the future

796
00:39:29,566 --> 00:39:33,166
to make sure that I 
stay doing public art

797
00:39:33,166 --> 00:39:36,033
with communities of 
individuals with disabilities

798
00:39:36,033 --> 00:39:38,866
so that we can become 
visible in the art world.

799
00:39:42,966 --> 00:39:46,566
- Folks with disabilities are 
constantly adapting to a world

800
00:39:46,566 --> 00:39:49,566
that was not created 
with us in mind.

801
00:39:49,566 --> 00:39:52,566
How can we become more 
active in the planning?

802
00:39:52,566 --> 00:39:54,433
If we're to have a 
seat at the table,

803
00:39:54,433 --> 00:39:58,300
how do we create the 
table we all can use?

804
00:39:58,300 --> 00:40:02,366
Where we aren't simply invited, 
but part of its construct.

805
00:40:02,366 --> 00:40:07,266
The poet Rumi said, "Before 
right doing, before wrong doing,

806
00:40:07,266 --> 00:40:10,866
there is a field and I 
will meet you there."

807
00:40:10,866 --> 00:40:13,633
The arts can also help 
create a neutral zone,

808
00:40:13,633 --> 00:40:17,433
a unique perspective of 
language and experience,

809
00:40:17,433 --> 00:40:20,300
a place of mutual recognition.

810
00:40:20,300 --> 00:40:23,833
(indistinct chatters)

811
00:40:23,833 --> 00:40:26,066
- One thing that I have 
learned through the years

812
00:40:26,066 --> 00:40:28,000
that's been absolutely amazing

813
00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:31,733
in helping me communicate about 
having an autoimmune disease

814
00:40:31,733 --> 00:40:33,500
is spoon theory.

815
00:40:33,500 --> 00:40:37,233
What spoon theory says is 
that most regular people

816
00:40:37,233 --> 00:40:38,833
can just wake up

817
00:40:38,833 --> 00:40:41,400
and they'll have the energy to 
do the things they need to do

818
00:40:41,400 --> 00:40:42,900
to get through their day.

819
00:40:42,900 --> 00:40:44,700
And they don't have to 
think about it very much.

820
00:40:44,700 --> 00:40:46,666
But when you're dealing 
with chronic illness,

821
00:40:46,666 --> 00:40:49,666
you have a limited 
amount of energy.

822
00:40:49,666 --> 00:40:53,100
And most people say you 
have about 12 spoons,

823
00:40:53,100 --> 00:40:55,966
and each spoon represents 
a unit of energy.

824
00:40:55,966 --> 00:40:59,033
So a day with my spoons 
might look like this.

825
00:41:00,233 --> 00:41:04,633
I wake up in the morning 
and I spend one spoon.

826
00:41:04,633 --> 00:41:05,866
What? You might be saying,

827
00:41:05,866 --> 00:41:07,433
you spend a spoon 
just to wake up.

828
00:41:07,433 --> 00:41:09,200
I don't even think about it.

829
00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:12,966
Yes, one spoon, showering,

830
00:41:12,966 --> 00:41:16,333
and heaven forbid I have 
to wash my hair or shave,

831
00:41:16,333 --> 00:41:18,366
especially above the knee too,

832
00:41:19,366 --> 00:41:21,933
add a couple more spoons.

833
00:41:21,933 --> 00:41:25,366
One spoon, eating breakfast.

834
00:41:25,366 --> 00:41:27,800
One spoon, taking my meds

835
00:41:27,800 --> 00:41:30,366
and dealing with the 
side effects for the day.

836
00:41:30,366 --> 00:41:32,800
One spoon, driving to work.

837
00:41:32,800 --> 00:41:34,433
Better hope the roads are good.

838
00:41:34,433 --> 00:41:36,600
One spoon, walking to my office.

839
00:41:36,600 --> 00:41:39,166
It is 0.6 miles 
from where I park

840
00:41:39,166 --> 00:41:41,533
to where I park my 
butt for the day.

841
00:41:41,533 --> 00:41:44,200
So for those of you 
keeping track at home,

842
00:41:44,200 --> 00:41:46,666
I am just sitting 
down to start work

843
00:41:46,666 --> 00:41:50,233
and I have spent 
half of my spoons.

844
00:41:50,233 --> 00:41:53,400
So now I start work, 
they usually say 
about a spoon per hour

845
00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:54,666
about a spoon per hour

846
00:41:54,666 --> 00:41:56,266
depending on what 
you do for work,

847
00:41:56,266 --> 00:41:58,433
so a couple spoons goes to work.

848
00:41:58,433 --> 00:42:01,700
Then I might wanna 
get some lunch,

849
00:42:01,700 --> 00:42:03,033
and all of a sudden

850
00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:06,233
I start to have to make 
really hard decisions

851
00:42:06,233 --> 00:42:07,633
for the rest of the day.

852
00:42:07,633 --> 00:42:09,933
I have to work a few more hours.

853
00:42:09,933 --> 00:42:12,966
And, you know, even sitting 
there for a long time

854
00:42:12,966 --> 00:42:15,566
can really cause a lot of pain.

855
00:42:15,566 --> 00:42:17,066
I know that seems silly,

856
00:42:17,066 --> 00:42:21,666
but really sitting in the same 
position is hard on my body.

857
00:42:21,666 --> 00:42:24,666
And I mean, no matter what, 
I still have to drive home,

858
00:42:24,666 --> 00:42:27,600
and evening rush 
hour is always worse.

859
00:42:27,600 --> 00:42:28,933
And then when I 
get home, I mean,

860
00:42:28,933 --> 00:42:30,700
I probably wanna make a meal.

861
00:42:30,700 --> 00:42:32,166
And maybe it's 
like super healthy,

862
00:42:32,166 --> 00:42:33,900
so I'm doing a lot of 
chopping and stuff.

863
00:42:33,900 --> 00:42:36,066
And then, you know, 
I wanna do dishes,

864
00:42:36,066 --> 00:42:39,766
and I should probably like do 
laundry and clean the house,

865
00:42:39,766 --> 00:42:42,733
and heaven forbid I wanna 
spend some time with friends

866
00:42:42,733 --> 00:42:43,766
and have some fun.

867
00:42:43,766 --> 00:42:46,600
And the story is,

868
00:42:47,933 --> 00:42:50,133
there are just 
never enough spoons.

869
00:42:51,566 --> 00:42:54,500
And in March of 2020, 
I mean, I'll be honest,

870
00:42:54,500 --> 00:42:57,133
I had a pretty great setup.

871
00:42:57,133 --> 00:42:59,400
I was working part-time.

872
00:42:59,400 --> 00:43:02,466
I only went into the office 
every Monday and Tuesday,

873
00:43:02,466 --> 00:43:05,133
and then I worked from 
home the rest of the week.

874
00:43:05,133 --> 00:43:07,466
And, you know, my coworkers 
like they were like okay,

875
00:43:07,466 --> 00:43:09,033
they weren't great 
about remembering

876
00:43:09,033 --> 00:43:11,433
to dial me into 
meetings all the time,

877
00:43:11,433 --> 00:43:13,966
'cause I was the only 
one not in the office.

878
00:43:13,966 --> 00:43:18,066
And on March 10th, my boss 
came to visit me in my cubicle.

879
00:43:18,066 --> 00:43:20,466
We can hear people like coughing

880
00:43:20,466 --> 00:43:23,133
and sneezing all around me.

881
00:43:24,233 --> 00:43:26,366
And she said, "You 
should go home.

882
00:43:26,366 --> 00:43:28,400
You don't want that to get you."

883
00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:33,200
Seven days later, everybody 
was sent home for two years.

884
00:43:34,900 --> 00:43:39,466
All of a sudden, something 
sort of magical happened.

885
00:43:39,466 --> 00:43:41,000
(chuckles)

886
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:44,133
All of a sudden, everyone 
was at home all the time.

887
00:43:44,133 --> 00:43:46,566
All of a sudden, I'm 
invited to every meeting.

888
00:43:46,566 --> 00:43:49,000
All of a sudden, 
we're all on camera.

889
00:43:49,000 --> 00:43:52,933
We're all wearing our pajamas. 
It doesn't matter why.

890
00:43:52,933 --> 00:43:57,066
And all of a sudden, every 
show, every conference,

891
00:43:57,066 --> 00:43:59,600
everything was online.

892
00:44:00,800 --> 00:44:02,333
And here's the thing,

893
00:44:07,266 --> 00:44:08,966
this is what my 
new days look like.

894
00:44:11,066 --> 00:44:14,466
One spoon, waking up.

895
00:44:14,466 --> 00:44:15,966
I can tell it's 
gonna be a rough day.

896
00:44:15,966 --> 00:44:19,866
So I just stay right where I 
am and I pop my computer open

897
00:44:19,866 --> 00:44:22,000
and start working.

898
00:44:22,000 --> 00:44:24,000
I work for a couple of hours.

899
00:44:25,066 --> 00:44:26,933
And then when I'm ready 
to, I go downstairs

900
00:44:26,933 --> 00:44:28,966
and I make some 
food for breakfast,

901
00:44:28,966 --> 00:44:31,666
save enough to eat 
for lunch later.

902
00:44:31,666 --> 00:44:34,233
And, you know, then I 
come back and work again.

903
00:44:34,233 --> 00:44:36,866
And if I'm feeling good 
enough, I can take a shower.

904
00:44:36,866 --> 00:44:38,633
But honestly, like, 
I don't have to.

905
00:44:38,633 --> 00:44:42,166
And it really does 
make a difference

906
00:44:42,166 --> 00:44:45,600
if I get the choice of when 
I do this during my day.

907
00:44:45,600 --> 00:44:47,766
(all laugh)

908
00:44:47,766 --> 00:44:51,366
And then, you know, I can 
work for a couple more hours,

909
00:44:51,366 --> 00:44:53,833
and I can move 
around as I want to.

910
00:44:53,833 --> 00:44:57,166
So I'm not getting sore, I'm 
not getting this brain fog,

911
00:44:57,166 --> 00:44:58,533
I'm feeling good.

912
00:44:58,533 --> 00:44:59,766
And, you know, in the afternoon

913
00:44:59,766 --> 00:45:01,966
I can take my dog 
out for a walk.

914
00:45:01,966 --> 00:45:05,500
And holy crap you all, if 
you're keeping track at home,

915
00:45:05,500 --> 00:45:08,466
I still have a bunch 
of spoons left.

916
00:45:08,466 --> 00:45:09,933
I can have dinner.

917
00:45:09,933 --> 00:45:12,433
I mean, I can get online 
and play games with friends.

918
00:45:12,433 --> 00:45:14,433
And I still like have a spoon

919
00:45:14,433 --> 00:45:16,333
to deal with the 
stress of the pandemic

920
00:45:16,333 --> 00:45:18,000
without totally tapping out.

921
00:45:18,000 --> 00:45:20,866
(audience laugh)

922
00:45:20,866 --> 00:45:24,933
And so the best thing 
about all of this

923
00:45:26,466 --> 00:45:29,000
was everyone was in it with me.

924
00:45:29,000 --> 00:45:32,733
Nobody was judging 
my situation anymore.

925
00:45:32,733 --> 00:45:37,266
There was a lot to 
appreciate during that time.

926
00:45:37,266 --> 00:45:38,533
I realized about a month in

927
00:45:38,533 --> 00:45:40,966
that I actually didn't 
have any pain anymore,

928
00:45:40,966 --> 00:45:44,100
'cause I was so in 
control of how I moved.

929
00:45:44,100 --> 00:45:45,566
And I'm definitely 
not saying this

930
00:45:45,566 --> 00:45:47,800
to like minimize the terror 
of the pandemic, right?

931
00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:50,500
'Cause I was like, holy 
crap, scared of dying

932
00:45:50,500 --> 00:45:52,866
every second of every 
day for a lot of months.

933
00:45:52,866 --> 00:45:53,700
(chuckles)

934
00:45:53,700 --> 00:45:54,600
But,

935
00:45:56,200 --> 00:45:58,100
over the last year,

936
00:45:59,233 --> 00:46:01,000
I've had to mourn all over again

937
00:46:02,333 --> 00:46:04,600
as a lot of these 
opportunities disappeared.

938
00:46:05,700 --> 00:46:07,700
And, you know, some 
things have stayed

939
00:46:07,700 --> 00:46:12,666
or been added on as permanent 
features and that is amazing.

940
00:46:14,166 --> 00:46:17,766
But it's a little different, 
because once again,

941
00:46:17,766 --> 00:46:19,533
we're not all in it together.

942
00:46:20,866 --> 00:46:25,533
Once again, there are haves 
and there are have-nots,

943
00:46:26,633 --> 00:46:29,133
and life is navigating 
lots of hard choices

944
00:46:29,133 --> 00:46:31,200
and constantly feeling 
judged by them.

945
00:46:32,500 --> 00:46:35,166
And you never know what 
people are dealing with.

946
00:46:35,166 --> 00:46:38,400
I'm invisible while in pain.

947
00:46:39,500 --> 00:46:43,700
I'm invisible while on fire.

948
00:46:45,333 --> 00:46:48,366
I will keep my blaze burning.

949
00:46:49,700 --> 00:46:50,633
Thank you.

950
00:46:50,633 --> 00:46:54,133
(audience applaud)

951
00:46:54,133 --> 00:46:56,166
- American culture teaches us

952
00:46:56,166 --> 00:46:59,600
that we should be self-reliant 
and self-sufficient.

953
00:46:59,600 --> 00:47:02,000
That this is the 
goal of normal people

954
00:47:02,000 --> 00:47:03,900
and has been the 
goal of medicine,

955
00:47:03,900 --> 00:47:07,033
independence and a 
freedom from needing care.

956
00:47:07,033 --> 00:47:10,733
- But this is not the lived 
reality for any of us,

957
00:47:10,733 --> 00:47:12,466
not just disabled people.

958
00:47:13,833 --> 00:47:17,500
- Unlearning in medicine is 
leaning into the understanding

959
00:47:17,500 --> 00:47:22,266
that we are a part of and 
not apart from community.

960
00:47:22,266 --> 00:47:25,766
- Throughout our lives 
in big ways and small,

961
00:47:25,766 --> 00:47:27,733
we all need care.

962
00:47:27,733 --> 00:47:31,900
In disability culture, we 
call this interdependence,

963
00:47:31,900 --> 00:47:34,900
acknowledging that to 
survive and thrive,

964
00:47:34,900 --> 00:47:38,333
humans need each other, 
to care for each other

965
00:47:38,333 --> 00:47:40,400
and to be cared for in return.

966
00:47:40,400 --> 00:47:43,433
And we find this 
care in community.

967
00:47:43,433 --> 00:47:47,500
- It is within community 
that we eat, laugh, plan,

968
00:47:47,500 --> 00:47:49,766
share our struggles 
and triumphs.

969
00:47:49,766 --> 00:47:53,066
We learn, we grieve, 
and we celebrate.

970
00:47:53,066 --> 00:47:55,900
We come face-to-face 
with our own humanity

971
00:47:55,900 --> 00:47:58,233
and the humanity of others.

972
00:47:58,233 --> 00:48:03,066
- Resiliency is defined 
as maintaining one shape.

973
00:48:03,066 --> 00:48:05,266
While needing to be resilient

974
00:48:05,266 --> 00:48:08,366
is a difficult topic for 
many marginalized people,

975
00:48:08,366 --> 00:48:11,733
because we often gain 
resiliency through adverse,

976
00:48:11,733 --> 00:48:14,100
unjust experiences.

977
00:48:14,100 --> 00:48:17,866
Through community, we 
learn to maintain our shape

978
00:48:17,866 --> 00:48:19,600
after it's been compromised

979
00:48:19,600 --> 00:48:22,100
by changes to our 
bodies and minds,

980
00:48:22,100 --> 00:48:24,833
and most often by the 
society we live in.

981
00:48:25,933 --> 00:48:27,900
- As science and 
history tells us,

982
00:48:27,900 --> 00:48:31,166
a species is defined 
by its similarities,

983
00:48:31,166 --> 00:48:35,466
but it survives by its 
differences to others

984
00:48:35,466 --> 00:48:37,000
and those within its group.

985
00:48:37,000 --> 00:48:40,133
That means we may not 
agree all the time,

986
00:48:40,133 --> 00:48:43,233
but a community is a space 
where I bring who I am

987
00:48:43,233 --> 00:48:46,533
to who you are, our herd, 
our flock, our pack,

988
00:48:46,533 --> 00:48:49,666
a place we all belong.

989
00:48:49,666 --> 00:48:51,766
(calm music)

990
00:48:51,766 --> 00:48:53,166
- For me,

991
00:48:53,166 --> 00:48:55,333
what's unique about disability 
culture and community-

992
00:48:55,333 --> 00:48:57,933
- Disability culture is 
helping me understand

993
00:48:57,933 --> 00:49:00,733
coping with my autism 
and helping me understand

994
00:49:00,733 --> 00:49:02,700
what's like who am.

995
00:49:02,700 --> 00:49:05,233
- Is that we kick butt.

996
00:49:05,233 --> 00:49:06,666
(chuckles)

997
00:49:06,666 --> 00:49:11,133
- You're with other people 
that have lived the experience.

998
00:49:12,200 --> 00:49:14,566
- We all kind of 
understand each other

999
00:49:14,566 --> 00:49:16,833
in a way that is relatable.

1000
00:49:16,833 --> 00:49:19,666
- How much unparalleled 
support there is.

1001
00:49:19,666 --> 00:49:22,533
- The thing that's unique 
about disability culture

1002
00:49:22,533 --> 00:49:24,766
and community is 
that we just get it.

1003
00:49:24,766 --> 00:49:27,266
(calm music)

1004
00:49:28,566 --> 00:49:31,766
- Art has the power 
to transform us

1005
00:49:31,766 --> 00:49:33,833
by allowing us to experience

1006
00:49:33,833 --> 00:49:35,800
a different viewpoint 
in the world

1007
00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:38,033
from a non-judgmental space.

1008
00:49:38,033 --> 00:49:39,433
And the music that we write

1009
00:49:39,433 --> 00:49:41,533
is really just the 
human experience.

1010
00:49:41,533 --> 00:49:44,000
(calm music)

1011
00:49:48,566 --> 00:49:50,600
My music is 
primarily folk music.

1012
00:49:50,600 --> 00:49:53,933
I'm really into lyrics 
and melodies and harmonies

1013
00:49:53,933 --> 00:49:55,166
in the folk tradition.

1014
00:49:55,166 --> 00:49:56,733
And then I also 
have some influences

1015
00:49:56,733 --> 00:49:58,733
from Celtic music, specifically.

1016
00:49:59,866 --> 00:50:01,600
But because of a looping pedal,

1017
00:50:01,600 --> 00:50:05,800
there's also this element of 
experimental ambient sounds.

1018
00:50:05,800 --> 00:50:08,800
And so it's sort of a blending 
of different traditions.

1019
00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:11,266
(calm music)

1020
00:50:12,066 --> 00:50:13,400
I think the role of art

1021
00:50:13,400 --> 00:50:16,066
is to connect with 
our creative energy.

1022
00:50:16,066 --> 00:50:18,366
I think something 
in us, very human,

1023
00:50:18,366 --> 00:50:21,366
is just this desire 
to play and create

1024
00:50:21,366 --> 00:50:22,866
and experience new things

1025
00:50:22,866 --> 00:50:24,833
and I think art 
accomplishes all of that.

1026
00:50:24,833 --> 00:50:27,333
(calm music)

1027
00:50:30,566 --> 00:50:34,300
And also helps us 
to express emotions

1028
00:50:34,300 --> 00:50:35,366
that we might not 
have words for.

1029
00:50:35,366 --> 00:50:37,933
And it's a really human thing

1030
00:50:37,933 --> 00:50:42,000
to wanna express what's inside 
of us in a creative way.

1031
00:50:42,000 --> 00:50:46,100
♪ Can you see me, way 
in the back here ♪

1032
00:50:46,100 --> 00:50:50,433
♪ I've been waiting, I've 
been waiting in line ♪

1033
00:50:50,433 --> 00:50:52,333
♪ It's been a long time

1034
00:50:52,333 --> 00:50:54,566
♪ Can't get no service

1035
00:50:54,566 --> 00:50:59,533
♪ Still I'm hoping, I 
am hoping for a sign ♪

1036
00:51:02,466 --> 00:51:05,233
♪ That one day 
things will change ♪

1037
00:51:05,233 --> 00:51:10,300
♪ And we can finally 
take our place ♪

1038
00:51:11,133 --> 00:51:13,966
♪ That history won't forget us

1039
00:51:13,966 --> 00:51:18,000
♪ Or try to minimize our pain

1040
00:51:18,000 --> 00:51:20,100
♪ And so I wait

1041
00:51:20,100 --> 00:51:23,400
I got started in 
music in fifth grade.

1042
00:51:23,400 --> 00:51:26,433
There was an orchestra that 
came to our elementary school

1043
00:51:26,433 --> 00:51:27,933
and played for us.

1044
00:51:27,933 --> 00:51:29,766
And I loved the sound of 
all the strings together.

1045
00:51:29,766 --> 00:51:31,666
And I knew that that's 
what I wanted to do.

1046
00:51:31,666 --> 00:51:34,566
And so we figured out a way 
that I could hold the violin.

1047
00:51:34,566 --> 00:51:36,666
I hold it in front of 
me like a small cello.

1048
00:51:36,666 --> 00:51:38,033
And I've been 
playing ever since.

1049
00:51:38,033 --> 00:51:41,833
♪ Did you know that 
when I get angry ♪

1050
00:51:41,833 --> 00:51:45,733
♪ I breath fire, I can 
burn this place down ♪

1051
00:51:45,733 --> 00:51:50,000
♪ You may not realize 
all of the small ways ♪

1052
00:51:50,000 --> 00:51:54,500
♪ I am not welcome, but 
just take a look around ♪

1053
00:51:54,500 --> 00:51:58,733
Disabled people are 
resilient, we're adaptable,

1054
00:51:58,733 --> 00:52:03,066
we're creative, and I 
think we see the world

1055
00:52:03,066 --> 00:52:06,633
and our relationships in it 
through a different lens.

1056
00:52:06,633 --> 00:52:10,966
To me, that is the essence 
of disability culture.

1057
00:52:10,966 --> 00:52:13,000
♪ Pushing up, pushing up

1058
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:15,233
♪ Through the dirt 
just like a seed ♪

1059
00:52:15,233 --> 00:52:17,633
♪ But you're never 
quite a flower ♪

1060
00:52:17,633 --> 00:52:19,766
♪ You feel more 
just like a weed ♪

1061
00:52:19,766 --> 00:52:22,766
♪ Driving through, 
driving through ♪

1062
00:52:22,766 --> 00:52:24,733
♪ You don't know 
where you are going ♪

1063
00:52:24,733 --> 00:52:27,533
♪ But the windshield's 
always dirty ♪

1064
00:52:27,533 --> 00:52:30,433
♪ And you never get to see

1065
00:52:30,433 --> 00:52:34,966
♪ What makes you think that 
you'll ever get there? ♪

1066
00:52:34,966 --> 00:52:40,033
♪ What makes you think 
you deserve to know? ♪

1067
00:52:40,566 --> 00:52:44,200
♪ Who are you really, 
are you so important? ♪

1068
00:52:44,200 --> 00:52:46,600
♪ Take a look around

1069
00:52:46,600 --> 00:52:51,666
♪ and watch the world unfold

1070
00:52:52,600 --> 00:52:56,300
♪ Watch the world unfold

1071
00:52:59,533 --> 00:53:02,366
Disability culture has been 
like an evolving thing for me,

1072
00:53:02,366 --> 00:53:04,400
just like realizing 
that it's out there

1073
00:53:04,400 --> 00:53:05,566
and that you're not alone.

1074
00:53:05,566 --> 00:53:07,866
- I feel like 
there's this aspect

1075
00:53:07,866 --> 00:53:12,033
of like we are creating 
the culture as we make art

1076
00:53:12,033 --> 00:53:14,000
and as we connect with people.

1077
00:53:14,000 --> 00:53:16,766
- One thing that's been 
really important to me

1078
00:53:16,766 --> 00:53:21,066
in the last few years is 
nurturing a sense of community

1079
00:53:21,066 --> 00:53:22,933
among other disabled artists.

1080
00:53:22,933 --> 00:53:24,300
Part of it is because

1081
00:53:24,300 --> 00:53:26,600
we haven't been 
amplified in our society,

1082
00:53:26,600 --> 00:53:28,833
so a lot of us 
felt very isolated,

1083
00:53:28,833 --> 00:53:31,866
because we were navigating 
the music industry

1084
00:53:31,866 --> 00:53:35,133
in a way that it was not 
very accessible right now.

1085
00:53:35,133 --> 00:53:36,566
- For a lot of my life,

1086
00:53:36,566 --> 00:53:40,600
I lived in a world 
not designed for me.

1087
00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:41,833
- Yep.

1088
00:53:41,833 --> 00:53:44,133
- And so I hid it 
for a long time.

1089
00:53:44,133 --> 00:53:46,366
And it wasn't until I 
understood that, hey,

1090
00:53:46,366 --> 00:53:50,466
I'm not gonna get anywhere 
in life without asking for,

1091
00:53:50,466 --> 00:53:52,666
not help, but, hey, support.

1092
00:53:52,666 --> 00:53:57,600
And being open and becoming 
vulnerable with other people.

1093
00:53:57,600 --> 00:54:00,166
- I love thinking about 
disability culture,

1094
00:54:00,166 --> 00:54:03,366
because it reframes disability 
from something negative

1095
00:54:03,366 --> 00:54:08,166
into just a form of diversity 
that really can be celebrated.

1096
00:54:08,166 --> 00:54:13,233
- It lets other people into 
the world and into the culture,

1097
00:54:14,466 --> 00:54:16,300
because we're all just 
different bodies and we're all-

1098
00:54:16,300 --> 00:54:17,833
- Exactly.

1099
00:54:17,833 --> 00:54:19,233
- Trying to figure out how to 
be in the same space together.

1100
00:54:19,233 --> 00:54:20,466
- Well, what I love about this

1101
00:54:20,466 --> 00:54:21,966
is that we've built a 
bit of culture here.

1102
00:54:21,966 --> 00:54:23,600
We are a culture of three. 
We are a community of three.

1103
00:54:23,600 --> 00:54:25,166
- Mhm-mm. 
- Right.

1104
00:54:25,166 --> 00:54:29,833
♪ Who are you really, 
are you so important ♪

1105
00:54:29,833 --> 00:54:32,566
♪ Take a look around

1106
00:54:32,566 --> 00:54:37,333
♪ and watch the world unfold

1107
00:54:37,333 --> 00:54:42,333
♪ Watch the world unfold

1108
00:54:42,333 --> 00:54:46,966
♪ Watch the world unfold

1109
00:54:46,966 --> 00:54:50,533
♪ Watch the world unfold

1110
00:54:53,933 --> 00:54:58,100
- We hope this exploration 
of disability and medicine

1111
00:54:58,100 --> 00:55:00,233
through the arts was insightful,

1112
00:55:00,233 --> 00:55:04,300
and helped open up new ideas 
and new perspectives for you.

1113
00:55:04,300 --> 00:55:07,866
- Joy is a big part 
of disabled experience

1114
00:55:07,866 --> 00:55:10,333
and human experience.

1115
00:55:10,333 --> 00:55:13,433
- So as we close, we 
pose one more question

1116
00:55:13,433 --> 00:55:18,100
to our artists and providers, 
what brings you joy?

1117
00:55:21,033 --> 00:55:22,833
- Things that bring me joy...

1118
00:55:23,866 --> 00:55:25,300
(chuckles)

1119
00:55:25,300 --> 00:55:27,900
- Uh, what brings me joy? Oh...

1120
00:55:30,100 --> 00:55:31,133
- Oh, that's a good question.

1121
00:55:31,133 --> 00:55:32,700
I like seeing construction work.

1122
00:55:32,700 --> 00:55:35,866
I like seeing big 
use construction 
machines being built.

1123
00:55:35,866 --> 00:55:40,166
- Being outside, discovery, 
taking care of people.

1124
00:55:40,166 --> 00:55:43,433
- The spring in Minnesota, 
I mean, the sun.

1125
00:55:43,433 --> 00:55:46,800
- My cat, Indiana 
Jones. She's adorable.

1126
00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:48,366
What brings me joy?

1127
00:55:48,366 --> 00:55:52,500
- Ice cream. Thank 
goodness for ice cream.

1128
00:55:52,500 --> 00:55:56,000
- My family brings me a 
lot of joy, my friends.

1129
00:55:56,000 --> 00:55:59,466
- My ability to help people 
and make a difference.

1130
00:55:59,466 --> 00:56:03,933
- Anytime I see patients 
taking steps towards thriving.

1131
00:56:03,933 --> 00:56:09,000
- What really brings me 
joy is helping others.

1132
00:56:10,300 --> 00:56:13,866
- Is the ability to 
capital B, capital E, BE.

1133
00:56:13,866 --> 00:56:15,333
- Life brings me joy.

1134
00:56:15,333 --> 00:56:18,600
- Just having fun, that's 
what brings joy to me.

1135
00:56:18,600 --> 00:56:21,100
(calm music)

1136
00:56:23,800 --> 00:56:26,200
- [Announcer] This program 
was produced in collaboration

1137
00:56:26,200 --> 00:56:27,966
with the Center for 
the Art of Medicine

1138
00:56:27,966 --> 00:56:30,466
at the University of 
Minnesota Medical School.

1139
00:56:30,466 --> 00:56:33,800
And funded by the Minnesota 
Arts and Cultural Heritage Fund

1140
00:56:33,800 --> 00:56:35,600
and the citizens of Minnesota.

1141
00:56:36,533 --> 00:56:39,100
(calm music)